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Home » Five habits that kill relationships
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Five habits that kill relationships

Joanna Oyeleke
September 5, 2022
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Relationships are beautiful when they are established,  nurtured and built in the right way.   

Contents
  • 1. Unhealthy comparison   
  • 2. Choosing your parents over your partner   
  • 3. Dismissing your partner’s dreams or ambitions  
  • 4. Always desiring to change your partner   
  • 4. Forgetting the “Big Days”  

Quite a number of relationships have experienced premature death as a result of certain habits that partners do not pay attention to. There are certain things partners in a relationship do consciously or unconsciously that unknowing to them hampers the growth of their relationships.   

It has been said that you cannot go beyond what you know. Some individuals keep displaying same habit with different partners because of ignorance and they keep wondering why their relationships don’t work out well.   

Have you been having issues with your relationships? Is this a time to reflect on your past relationships and reasons they failed? Do you think you have certain habits that might have been the cause of your failed relationship?  

Check out 5 habits that kills relationships and the way forward.  

1. Unhealthy comparison   

The number one killer of any relationship is unhealthy comparison.   

To make any relationship work, you need to accept your partner for who they are. Whenever you compare your partner with another person, you are killing their self esteem and worth.  

You need to understand that that individual that seems perfect that you are comparing your partner with also has their shortcomings.   

To end unhealthy comparison, you need to love and appreciate your partner regardless of their weaknesses. If you feel there are things they can work on to become better individuals, talk to them about it with love and not through unhealthy comparison.   

2. Choosing your parents over your partner   

This is a sensitive matter and should be handled with utmost care.  No one can undermine the role and impact of our parents in our lives but regardless of this when it comes to deciding on whose interests should come first, it should be that of our partners.   

This doesn’t mean you should sideline your parents, it only means your partner is a priority in your life.   

Constantly choosing your parents over your partner can make the other party feel they are of no importance to you and this can cause a rift between your parents and your partner.  

Especially for guys who choose their mother over their partner, you begin to make her feel your mother is competing for her space in your life and vice versa.   

You should always remember that you will spend more years with your partner than the number of years you spent with your parents, so, ensure you strike a balance and prioritise your partner without neglecting your parents.   

3. Dismissing your partner’s dreams or ambitions  

If you are constantly in the habit of dismissing or finding faults with your partner’s dreams and ambitions, then you have killed that relationship with your own hands.   

No one wants to be with a person who doesn’t believe in them or support their dreams. Dismissing your partner’s dreams only makes them feel hurt. And this hurts most times if not always usually leads to resentment.  

To put an end to this habit, you need to be your partner’s number 1 fan and supporter of their dreams and ambitions. You also need to play an active part in the actualisation of their dreams and ambitions.  

4. Always desiring to change your partner   

Nothing hurts more than having a partner who doesn’t appreciate you for who you are and is hell bent on changing your personality.   

You frustrate your partner and your relationship when you always have the desire to change them into your spec or into another individual based on your fantasies and personal interests.   

There is nothing bad if you want your partner to get better or become better versions of themselves. It only becomes a bad habit and  a potential killer of your relationship when you want to transform them into what seems best to you overnight.  

Your partner is a peculiar person and you should appreciate and love them for their uniqueness rather than trying to change them.  

4. Forgetting the “Big Days”  

Another habit that kills a relationship is forgetting the “big days “.  

When you constantly forget special days such as your partner’s birthday,  graduation day, medical appointments, anniversaries, and so on you tend to kill your relationship gradually.   

Women especially are very good at keeping important dates in mind and they expect the same of the other partner. Displaying this habit constantly hurts your partner and might make them conclude that you don’t care about them.  

As a solution to this habit, ensure you keep track of special days and if you forget dates easily, you can put them in your reminder.  

Is your anniversary coming soon, check out gifts to get for your wife or husband   

Relationships are meant to be nurtured and enjoyed. If you can work on these habits and any other that may have been affecting your relationship, you will have and enjoy the relationship of your dreams.   

Since you have identified the habits that has been responsible for the death of your relationship, check out how to build a happy and healthy relationship  

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