Have you ever spoken to some individuals that you just felt like the conversation shouldn’t end? And have you spoken to some people that you just looked for means and excuses to end the conversation as soon as possible?
The major reason you wanted the first conversation to go on was because the other person was a great conversationalist while the person in the second scenario wasn’t.
Knowing how to start and maintain a conversation is a valuable skill for making connections, fostering relationships and being effective at work.
Good conversations require a give and take, that is, when someone directs a question your way, you should always respond with an answer that will continue the flow of dialogue and not put an end to the conversation.
Some people seem to be born conversationalists as they can talk to anyone about anything and keep a good conversation going while some people struggle to even have a small talk.
If you fall in the second category of people, you need not worry as this communication skill can be learned and perfected.
Discussed in this article are tips to help you become an amazing conversationalist that everyone will love to talk to.
1. Be an active listener
Having good conversations is not all about you speaking, it also requires you to be an active listener. When having conversations with people, your ability to actively listen makes the time they spend with you memorable and it makes them eager to want to have other opportunities to speak to you.
The irony of being a good conversationalist is that talking isn’t the most important piece; listening is what makes you memorable.
To be an amazing conversationalist, don’t just listen for listening sake, be an active listener!
2. Be courteous
To be an amazing conversationalist, you must be courteous. The fact that people are willing to open up to you or give you the opportunity to have a conversation with them doesn’t mean you should lose your courtesy.
Showing good manners and respect for the other person is the only way to keep a meaningful conversation flowing.
Traits of courteous conversation include refraining from interrupting the speaker, paying full attention to the speaker, avoiding talking excessively about one’s self and refraining from looking at one’s phone.
3. Share some of your experiences (optional)
This tip is subjective as you should only do this if you’re comfortable with the idea or there is a need for it during a conversation.
Sharing something about yourself invites the other person to open up and respond in turn. Revealing a personal detail is a great conversation-starter and is an equally great way to develop relationships with others.
Please note that as a good conversationalist you should be intelligent enough to know how much of your experience to share and when to stop.
4. Don’t be shy to admit that you are not all-knowing
No one is an island of knowledge. As an amazing conversationalist, you don’t need to pretend to be who you are not or claim to know what you actually don’t know.
You shoot yourself in the foot when you try to show yourself as an all-knowing or perfect being.
If during a conversation, you don’t know or get a thing, please speak up. Seek clarification from the other party. Make sure you ask questions.
This shows that you are truly listening to the person and interested in the conversation.
5. Read wide
To be an individual people will be willing to speak to, you need to read wide. Don’t just limit yourself, read on various topics, and fields in order to keep yourself informed.
Being well read allows you to be an all rounder during conversations, such that you always have something meaningful to contribute in any area of focus in a conversation. Be it career, business, relationship, parenting, purpose and much more.
Conversation itself is important to daily life but being a great conversationalist provides a much richer experience for you and the people you converse with, it leads to fulfilling relationships, understanding of each other, stimulates your brain, encourages creativity and connects you with the world.
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