How can I regain my weight?

Dear Yemisi,

I am a reader of your column. I commend your good work.

Before I got married, I was on the big side. But I have lost weight now that I am a mother. I discovered that I have shed weight seriously after the birth of my first baby.

Please, what do you think I can do to gain my weight back? I will not mind if there are drugs that you can recommend for me to get me fat again.

Favour, Kogi.

 

Dear Favour,

Why do you want to gain additional weight now that you are a mother? You should be happy that you have shed that excess luggage you were having as a single girl.

What comfort do you derive from being fat? As long as you are healthy and your husband is not complaining about your new status, you should be less burdened about this unhealthy weight.

You did not provide your age in your request, but there is a standard weight that you must maintain at every stage of your life. There is something called BMI in the health circle, which means Body Mass Index. In a lay man’s language it is the addition of your age with height and weight. The average of these three will either convince you or confuse you.

It will be better you see a health instructor to check this for you so as not to get yourself into trouble. Your current weight might be the best for your health. A nursing mother cannot afford not to be in good health that might have been occasioned by excess weight.

What you are experiencing is a natural phenomenon that you cannot do anything about unless you add weight naturally.

You will regain your weight back by the time you reach mid age when you are no longer bearing children. My candid advice for you is to keep and manage your weight for now.  Your health status is very crucial now so as to give your baby the best he deserves in terms of care.

Favour, I don’t know of any drug that can bring back your weight than eating nutritious meals that will not spell doom for your health and your baby. Don’t help yourself because those who have helped themselves in the past don’t always have good stories to tell.

How will my neighbours know that I am changed boy?

Dear Yemisi,

I want to believe you can help me out of the situation I have found myself.

I am a 17-year-old SSS3 student. My parents are born again Christians and I have tried my best not to offend them.

But out of ignorance and youthful exuberance, l fell in love with a girl in our neighbourhood when I was 14 years old.  The girl happened to be our neighbour’s  cousin who relocated from the North. While the relationship lasted, we did not have sex. Whenever we were together I only fondled with her breasts.

The point of attraction to her, were her boobs, which I ensured I always touch. I was indulged in this secretly because my parents must not be in the know. But as the saying goes that every day is for the thief, but a day for the owner was the day we were caught while I was kissing her in her aunt’s apartment.

As a novice it never crossed our minds that we were been watched by a woman in the third flat in the compound. Obviously, my girl’s aunt came in through the second door to their flat, on sighting her, I ran out of their flat.

Having seen my reaction made the girl’s aunt so curious and enraged.  She scolded and even threatened to send her back to her parents if she will not change her ways. As I am writing you, my parents are still in the dark about my attempt to be wayward.

Having seen my mistake, I have made up my mind to turn a new leaf. To my parents, I am innocent and they are always using as a point of reference whenever they have to counsel the teenagers in our assembly. I am now ready to give my life to Christ completely.

My concern now, how do I convince our neighbours who have shielded me from my parents scolding all this while that I am a changed boy. I have vowed to remain a virgin until the time I am ripe to have a true relationship with the opposite sex.

• Re: What can I do to get out of this mess?

How do I now demonstrate my innocence?

Please ma, help me out. Though my friends have told me on a number of times that what I did was nothing to lose sleep about.

I am expecting your reply in your next publication.

Tobby.

Dear Tobby,

Your sincerity is highly commendable and I pray that God will help you to stand by your confession. What you did is expected of a teenager who I will say feels he is old enough to be in charge of his life and actions.

But for you to have been caught by a neighbour while caressing your neighbour’s definitely calls for fear and anxiety as you would not like your parents to know that you have disappointed them with your encounter with your ‘girlfriend’. If what you have told me is the truth, then you should appreciate yourself for not going too far in your quest for fun.

To you, you were only catching fun. Now that you have realised that you did not walk your belief, it is better you ask for God’s assistance to help you in making your vow count. You should constantly check your motives and avoid being alone with any girl in hide outs.

You don’t have to convince anybody that you are now a changed boy, your action will say much about your confession. When they no longer see you with your neighbour’s cousin in questionable places and postures they will simmer.

Tobby, continue to allow your belief to guide your thoughts and actions. With time, you will overcome this fear of embarrassment from your neighbours. The best way to do this is by befriending your study.

And if the pressure keeps coming from the girl, you will have to call your parents attention to this. Tobby, your destiny is in your hand. Don’t be too much in a hurry to satisfy your thirst for the opposite sex.

There is time for everything.