The thief of joy is comparison, and when you approach your work without joy, you are likely to perform poorly at work and get half-baked results. Unnecessary comparison sets you up for poor performance and other wild and negative emotions.
There’s a popular saying that comparison is the thief of joy. The concept of dealing with comparison as a creative is not a new one. However, there are creatives who don’t know how to navigate when they have to deal with comparison.
Unnecessary comparison sometimes pushes you to measure how well you’re doing by another person’s progress. It is also trying to have by force what another person has; especially when you see yourself as somebody who doesn’t have the means of getting that thing. There are creatives who see themselves as unfortunate, especially when they see other people doing things that make them popular and valuable.
It is true that comparison can have positive effects on a creative, but it’s sad that the negative effects sometimes outweigh the positive effects. One of the positive effects of comparison that we’ve seen over time is that it motivates you to do better. You see somebody that is doing pretty well at what you want to do, you see how possible it is to succeed at it, and you strive to do better. That’s a good one.
What are the effects of comparison as a creative?
As stated earlier, the negative effects outweigh the positive effects.
- As a creative, unnecessary comparison would steal your joy. You’ll notice that you start feeling sad when you see people that you’re comparing yourself with doing things that you would love to do, but you think you cannot do. Then you start hating these people which could lead to you creating barriers that prevent you from coming close. Even if there’s an opportunity to learn from them you won’t because you can’t see beyond your hatred for them.
- Another effect that comparison has on you as a creative is that you lose focus on your journey; with regards to your career and life generally. You fail to understand what your journey entails anymore because you are focused on another person’s process. You begin to forget why you started out in the first place. You become so focused on their journey that you forget that your assignment and the path that leads to its accomplishment is not the same as theirs. Guess what, this could cost you the side to you that makes you original, then it will rub off on your brand and you may end up losing connection with your audience, and yourself. All these could happen for the inability to stay true to yourself.
- You deal with imposter syndrome as a creative when you allow unnecessary comparison of yourself with another person who appears to be doing better than you. You begin to tell yourself things like “I’m not valuable” “I feel like a fraud” “I should not be doing this in the first place.” All because there’s somebody better doing it and you can’t bear to see that.
- When you allow comparison as a creative, you start to change your identity and you make that person you’re comparing yourself to your “standard” for living. Then you find yourself doing things that you would not normally do because you’re comparing yourself with them.
- There’s a saying that your energy goes where your attention goes. All the energy that you need, all the attention that you need to invest in creating contents for your audience is channeled to stalking that person that you’re comparing yourself with. And that’s not a good thing for your brand. It’s unhealthy and in no time, you will not only lose you, but lose your brand.
- You become envious of them and any other person that appears to be doing better than you, because you can’t bear to see any other person doing better than you. And one thing you fail to understand is nobody can deliver value the way you do because they are not you. So, you are just shooting yourself in the leg by comparing yourself with someone else.
How do you know that you are dealing with unnecessary comparison as a creative?
- One of the major signs is that you find it hard to define who you truly are. When you begin to notice that it’s so hard to connect to who you truly are and you are so confused then you might be unnecessarily comparing yourself with someone; who knows?
- Another sign is you find yourself stalking that person you’re comparing yourself with and strive hard to prove that you’re better, at every opportunity you get; more like you create. And more than half the time your creative juice is invested in frivolous things instead of your brand.
- One of the proofs that you might be dealing with unnecessary comparison as a creative is that there could be a negative aura around you that makes it unbearable for you to see anybody around you succeed at what they do. You always want to be the one with the winning streak. You always want to be the talk of the moment and you run with an “All eyes on me” mentality.
- You’re always lost in the thought or the idea that you’re not meeting your expectations. You’re always angry at one person or another, and you keep beating yourself up because you feel that you’re worthless compared to those you’re measuring your life by.
Healthy ways to deal with unnecessary comparisons
1. Introspect and evaluate yourself
Try to understand why you’re comparing yourself in the first place. Ask yourself honest questions like “Why am I comparing myself with this person?” “What is this person doing that I am attracted to?” Try and ask yourself these questions and other questions that may lead you to the reason you’re comparing yourself with this person. What introspection does for you is that it reveals who you are to you.
2. Use words of affirmation
Words of affirmation help you to show up in the times when you’re feeling less of yourself, feeling tired and/or unwilling to show up for the things that matter, like creating content and many other things. Affirmations remind you of the good things about yourself. It reminds you that you’re worthy, and if anyone can, you can too.
3. Be strict about your use of social media
Limit your activities online. Watch how you use social media closely. You can set a time limit. Just ensure that your usage of social media is monitored. You could take a break from social media. Do not worry about what you will be doing during the break. Read here for the things you can do during your social media break.
4. Remind yourself of your achievements
Bringing to your remembrance memories of things that you’ve achieved. The seemingly little ones and the seemingly big ones. Remind yourself of the wins you’ve had. This will help you remember that you are not worthless. It will help you remember that you are valuable. It will remind you of the truth that you’ve laid your hands on things and they’ve prospered before.
5. Don’t hesitate to ask questions
When you admire someone, instead of trying to compare yourself with them, ask them questions genuinely and let them know that you are asking with the intention to learn. Let them teach you how they’ve been doing it. For instance, you engage your audience with content every day, but you don’t get engagement as much as someone who does not even reach out to his or her audience as much as you do. Ask them about it. There definitely has to be a smarter way to do it that you have not discovered. But how will you discover it if you don’t ask questions?
To wrap things up, dear creative, do not let anything steal your joy. Remember that you’re on a journey and you are not to strive to be better than someone. You should only strive to be a better version of yourself each time. Don’t forget your affirmations, remember to keep track of your achievements either daily, weekly, monthly, or bi-monthly; anyone that works for you. This will help you remember that you’re valuable and capable.
Remember this: Deal with unnecessary comparison before it deals with you. What will you do differently from today?