A Great Marriage is borne out of serving each other with undying love every moment. This must be unconditional love of service to each other. This is what a healthy marriage requires: you must discipline yourself to fall in love with your spouse over and over again, devoid of compulsion.
The choice to keep falling in love is less about romantic feelings and more about routine actions. That is, something you do consistently without any special reason. You don’t choose to love your spouse for a special reason. Rather, you love your spouse just like that. That’s what love is: unconditionally.
True love is sacrificial, and if you want to become a better lover, you’ll discipline yourself to serve your spouse daily, which is the ultimate sacrifice and your reasonable responsibility. It means laying down our lives for someone else.
Serving is your choice: you choose to be a servant lover. Thus, you look for ways to serve your spouse through simple, consistent, ordinary acts of kindness, without compulsion, and for no special reason or payback; instead, you serve as an expression of your love for your spouse. You can fall in love every day and express that love in practical acts of service. This is part of what the popular love keys in marriage is all about.
Let me further explain this with this scene of a married couple: A wife asked the husband to explain why he stopped buying her gifts and expensive jewelry after they got married. The husband’s response was “Have you seen a fisherman give worms to the fish after catching it?”. This husband’s response is against the principles of a successful marriage. This attitude will only put a marriage in jeopardy. We must avoid it like a plague.
A great marriage requires consistent love that is expressed in daily routine acts of kindness and support for each other.
We should not pause or abandon actions of love we engaged in during courtship, now that we are married. Or were those actions actually baits for us to get ourselves, just like the fisherman’s act of baiting fishes, alluded to earlier in this write-up? The right answer is absolute no!
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