Of Drainage and Seating

Sample 1: “Witness alleged that the soldiers attempted to dump the dead body of the deceased in a nearby drainage…” (The soldiers wanted to dump the dead body of the police officer in a drainage—eyewitness alleges, Opera News, 6 August, 2022)

I draw readers’ attention to a feature of the excerpt that occurs twice: “a nearby drainage” and “a drainage” (see the headline for the second appearance). The word drainage has obviously been used in the singular—what with the singular modifier a.  Relying on the grammar of this aspect of the text, it would be correct to say that the plural form of drainage is drainages. In the sense in which the word is used in this context, however, the plural form does not exist.

The grammatical error here (of pre-modifying drainage with a, and of course logically presenting its plural form as drainages) arises, I guess, because the reporter mistakes the drainage facilities for the system or process which the word drainage properly denotes. Yes, drainage is about the system or process of making water or any other liquid flow through an appropriate channel or facility. Drainage does not refer to a structure or facility; it is an uncountable noun denoting the process or system of movement of liquid.

It should be obvious that what the reporter has in mind when he uses the word drainage is the concrete structure, the facility, the water pathway being constructed for the drainage system. Many Nigerians frequently pluralize the word drainage. But it is an uncountable noun which, typically, should not be pluralized.

Please read the following sentences: 1) Given the poor drainage, erosion will damage this road within a short time. 2) Engineers are already thinking about ways of improving the efficiency of the drainage system. 3) I am not an engineer, but it should be obvious to any observer that the drainage facility is faulty. 4) I think it will be useful to construct the drainage facility before the major construction begins. 5) Water gathers on this portion of the road because of inadequate drainage. 6) The drains seem to be blocked somewhere along the line. 7) The problem is that the drains are not big enough. 8) The drains connected to the central drainage system are either broken or blocked.

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The important issue here is that the noun drainage should never be used in its plural form because it is an uncountable noun. In addition, it should not be modified by the indefinite article, a or its synonym. However, the word drain, referring to the pipe connected to the drainage system, is a countable noun and can be pluralised. For this reason, the following sentences are faulty: 1)The governor has given approval for the construction of more effective *drainages. 2) The problem of erosion is so severe in this neighbourhood because there are insufficient *drainages. 3) To avoid the havoc that uncontrolled water movement can cause, you should consider constructing *a drainage urgently. 4) *One drainage, however effective it may be, will not be eno ugh for the entire community. 5) The *drainages of the two communities should be effectively linked. 6) Every landlord should be compelled to have *a drainage. 7) This is *a poor drainage. 8) We are planning to have a drainage behind the house. 9) The *drainages have been damaged.

 The following sentences are the better versions of those faulty sentences: 1) The governor has given approval for the construction of a more effective drainage structure/facility/system/channel. 2) The problem of erosion is so severe in this neighbourhood because there are insufficient drainage facilities. 3) To avoid the havoc that uncontrolled water movement can cause, you should consider constructing a drainage structure urgently. 4) One drainage facility, however effective it may be, will not be enough for the entire community. 5) The drainage systems of the two communities should be effectively linked. 6) Every landlord should be compelled to have a drainage facility. 7) This is a poor drainage system. 8) We are planning to have a drainage facility behind the house. 9) The drainage facilities have been damaged. 

Instead of “a nearby drainage” and “a drainage”, we should have: “a nearby drainage hole/opening/structure…” and “a drainage hole/opening/structure…”

Sample 2: “Oye Kyme further stated that she can no longer give account of her life again (sic), adding that sometimes she seats down and sees how she ended up destroying her life because of money.” (Sometimes I seat down and see how I destroyed my life…Opera News, 29 June, 2022)

Let’s focus attention on the form seat which occurs twice as follows: “sometimes she seats down” and “sometimes I seat down.” Elementary grammar: You do not seat down; you sit down; you may be seated or you may take a seat, etc. It is amazing how confused some Nigerians are regarding aspects of the English grammar. various forms that should interest us are: sit, sitting, sat, seat, seated, and seating.

Let’s illustrate their usage in turn: (1) He has been sitting there all day, expecting the news of his parents’ arrival. (2) If he wasn’t sitting down, he was pacing the room anxiously. (3) He was sitting in his usual chair, watching the television. (4) Nobody can sit down until the president has done so. (5) After pacing for a few minutes, he sat down holding his chin ruefully. (6) I have not sat down because you have not asked me to sit down. (7) Janet sat beside her husband. (8) We all sat down as soon as the Chairman left the hall.

In those eight sentences, please note the forms sit (the basic form); sat (the past simple form); has/have sat (the past participle); and sitting (the continuous form). It is especially important to note that the form seating does not feature at all. Why? Because it cannot be used in its continuous form. There is the form seating, yes; but it does not belong to the context of the eight sentences constructed above.

Now read the following sentences: (1) You can now be seated. (2) Seated in one corner of the room was one gentleman who seemed not to be a part of what was going on. (3) In this congregation, women are seated separately from the men. (4) Before seating yourself at the desk, you have to tidy up the room. (5) Husbands and wives are seated close to each other. (6) All guests should be seated before the governor arrives. (7) Guests were seated in groups of four. (8) I don’t like to be seated close to the window.

Next, read the following sentences: (1) All the seats have been occupied by our visitors. (2) It is only the person driving that can sit in the driver’s seat. (3) I usually prefer to sit in the passenger’s seat. (4) Please take a seat. (5) What used to be comfortable seats are now in bad shape. (6) Abuja is the seat of the Federal Government of Nigeria. (7) Only five seats remain unoccupied in the plane. (8) You have up till tomorrow to book your seat. (9) Are universities still regarded as seats of learning? (10) Two people can join me in the back seat. (11) The front seats are reserved for the VIPs. (12) The brain is the seat of human reasoning just as the heart is the seat of emotion. (13) The Senator’s seat has been declared vacant by the leadership of the Senate. (14) The court has instructed the chairman to vacate his seat immediately. 15) He is perhaps the most controversial person to have occupied this sensitive seat. 16) The presidential seat is the most exalted in the land. 

Finally, read the following sentences: (1) The hall can seat one hundred people. (2) The theatre has a seating capacity of 500. (3) The protocol officer will take care of the seating arrangement. (4) The expansion will increase the seating capacity of the building. (5) Seating plans can be very challenging in situations like this. (6) The seating plan may change if some other big men decide to come.

Now note the following: You do not say: *”My father was *seating close to my mom”. You should say: “My father was sitting close to my mom. Do not say: *”I was *seating in the driver’s seat”. You should say: “I was sitting in the driver’s seat”. Do not say: *”Be *sitted”. You should say: “Be seated”. Do not say: *”I was *sitted close to my uncle”. You should say: “I was seated close to my uncle”.

Do not say: *”What is the sitting capacity of the hall?” You should say: “What is the seating capacity of the hall?” Do not say: *”The protocol officer is in charge of the *sitting arrangement”. You should say: “The protocol officer is in charge of the seating arrangement.”