Is this normal?

Dear Yemisi,

I am a 28-year-old lady. I am a university graduate working in oil and gas company based in Edo State. I was born and raised in Osun State.  I am equally an indigene of this state.

I met the love of my life during my days on the campus and we have been along well at least for four years now. Our intention is to get married soonest having understudied each other and we discovered that we are meant for each other.

I can say that I am from an average family where we never lacked all that makes life worth living. My husband to be is from a wealthy background. I have never been carried away by their affluence as long as I am satisfied with what my parents could afford and learnt to live within my means.

I am well received by my guy’s family members with the exception of one of my fiancee sisters. Her reason for being hostile towards me cannot be explained, but I have made up my mind not to get burdened by her hostile disposition.

When I observed this, I discussed with my love who assured me that I should think less of her as my main business should be him and no other person.

Now that we are planning to get the union formalised, some issues are surfacing as to where we’ll settle as husband and wife. My guy is based in Lagos which automatically will take me away from Benin. But I am getting disturbed by the day as I am having a second thought on my earlier thinking that I am welcomed to the family.

As we are crossing all the tees and dotting the I’s, the real picture of the family I want to be one of is becoming clearer to me. As I am writing you, my fiancée still resides in the family house. The house is situated in one of the high brow estates on Lagos Island. What is worrisome is the fact that my guy’s parents are insisting that we will have to be staying in one of the self-contained flats in the same premises with them since my husband to be is the only son.

I have told him on a number of times that I am not comfortable with this arrangement and that this decision cannot see the light of the day at my end. I told him about the need that we deserve to have our privacy, but he seems not to be on the same page with me on this.

This singular fact is about disrupting our plans as well as breaking the relationship. I opened up on why we should get our apartment by ourselves and that if his parents were insisting on helping, should assist by giving us cash to get the apartment furnished, but he has refused to see any reason with me.

Dear Yemisi, I will like to call it quits with him if he does not want to get himself freed of this attachment to his parents. What do you think I can do? He seldom replies my chats now and pretends that he is too busy. I am running out of patience.

Is it compulsory that we must stay on the same premises with my in-laws? Is it a normal practice? Am I not entitled to my opinion on issues?

I will appreciate if you can throw this request of mine open to your readers for their words of advice before I take the final decision. Your counsel too will make a difference.

Kikelomo.

Dear Readers, here we go again this week as Kikelomo is about taking the most critical decision of her life. She desires to have your candid pieces of advice on what to do about her unyielding husband to be. Send your contributions to 08055001741 or [email protected]