Destiny notes (2)

Last week, I identified four things you must understand about yourself to flourish anywhere on earth, no matter how tough the terrain. They are IDENTITY (or PERSONALITY), PURPOSE (a Value Code), POWER (current ability) and POTENTIAL (inherent capacity).

Nothing moves around you until something shifts within you. The world is in a flux. Things are happening at a dizzying rate. Social media presents you with conflicting and confusing images of what it takes to “make it”. It doesn’t matter how or what you do – shake your butt, expose your nakedness, dress or dance like a mad person, rake up a scandal against a prominent social figure or preacher, jump on the bandwagon of popular, even if untrue, gossip – just amass followers and get traffic to your monetized page. For some, it’s just business. You can do damage control later, even after you may have wrecked homes and relationships. Several wannabe social media celebrities have wreaked havoc on other people’s reputation only to later turn round when they get into trouble, to say that it was just a joke put out to “catch cruise” and gain followership that would fast-track their desire to monetize their content.

With various social media platforms, fame or notoriety is no longer so difficult to attain, and sometimes with some money to the bargain. It doesn’t matter if after all of the fame and applause, you still feel an emptiness within you as you watch or feel your life irredeemably falling apart. Every day, your mind is assaulted by the nagging conflict between your reputation and your true character because if the two were to meet in the dark, they cannot recognize themselves as belonging to the same person. Imagine someone who posits as a “go-to” relationship expert and marriage counsellor on social media with a humongous following but who, in real life, is a serial spouse abuser or who has made a mess of every single relationship he/she ever had!

Be careful who you make your role model. Because of the prevalence of an overwhelming false narrative and deceptive sound bytes coming out of social media and the world of entertainment, (in Nigerian movies, almost every rich middle-aged man is a senator, Honorable or Chief and almost every business man is a contractor)  an image of success is fixed in your mind as the huge bank account, the exotic cars, the expensive and expansive homes, the trips to the exotic islands and holiday resorts. And you are right, those MAY sometimes be indicative of success. But they are NOT success. That is why not everyone operating in that space is happy and fulfilled. Many of them got there only to discover the limitations of money and materialism in the quest for a meaningful existence. I have been in the company of stupendously rich people who were battling depression. Many of them, after making so much money, are asking themselves, “What next? Is this all there is to it”. A significant number of the people whose affluence you want to emulate actually wish to trade places with you. They cannot understand why you would sit or sleep on the floor and sleep so soundly while they have the best bed money can buy and they have to depend on medication to have three hours of sleep daily. Money can buy you a luxurious bed, but it cannot buy you sound sleep.

The klieg lights on many stars only deepen the pain of the darkness they feel within. The loneliness that floods the soul after the glamorous manifestation is not an experience to be desired. Many of those touted to command mouth-watering figures as fees actually live a borrowed life with debts to producers, managers and the other suppliers in the consumption chain. To cover up for the void that they live with daily, many take solace in drugs, alcohol and s3x. This is why several of them live in a bubble. They have no true friends because most of the people hanging around them are doing so purely because of the social capital that they represent. They also know that; a consciousness that only deepens the emptiness within. That is what happens when you pursue success outside of WHO you really are. The things you acquire can never fill the void that you feel inside. The world cheers. Your heart cries. That is not life. How do I know this? I came out of the showbiz world. It’s not called “make-believe” for nothing.

True satisfaction does not come from THINGS or worldly acclaim. It comes from WITHIN. The hunger of a soul for a higher cause for living can never be satiated by another wonder on wheels or another exotic edifice that waohs the public but numbs your spirit.

Contentment with WHO your Maker says you are or are becoming, rather than in what you achieve or who people’s applause—or even condemnation—says you are, is an internal compass that lets you know that not every door that opens to you or every opportunity that comes your way is yours to seize or will make you happy. Certain opportunities to “blow” can eventually blow you out of existence! True satisfaction is an INSIDE job!

An American multimillionaire who needed a break from his daily grind took a vacation to visit a Third World country. While there, he was taken by the local tour guide to a fishing village in a remote part of the country. The road was barely motorable. No electricity, no pipe borne water. But he saw a community of people who were genuinely happy as they went about their business. It was as if they had no care in the world.

When they got to the side of the river that sustained the villagers’ trade, he was struck by a particular guy who was smoking a pipe while swinging from side to side nestled in a hammock while bantering with his fellow fishermen. It was about 11.00 am. He wondered why anyone at that time of day would be happily idle.

His curiosity got the better of him as he moved towards the fisherman and asked,

“Why aren’t you out fishing?”

“I’m done for today. I went out earlier and I was able to sell my entire catch. I go again tomorrow,” came the reply.

“Really? Are you not limiting yourself? The day is still young. You could catch more fish and make more money”, said the tourist

The fisherman asked, “So that what can happen?”

“Well, then you can buy more boats, employ more hands and catch more fish, sell more and make more money till you become rich”, the tourist counseled.

To which the fisherman replied again, “So that what can happen?”

“A lot. You can expand your fleet and eventually buy a fishing trawler, catch more fish and sell to outside markets. Your business gets bigger, you make money on autopilot, become very rich and you can afford to take breaks like me and really enjoy yourself.”

Looking at the tourist with a corner of his eye and letting out a big puff of smoke from his pipe, the fisherman asked, “So what do you think I am doing now?” … continued

Remember, the sky is not your limit, God is!

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