If you are committed to a values-driven life, the first thing that it will do for you is to give you principles to live by. Principles are the standards of life that we set for ourselves based on our core values which derive essentially from our belief system. If your faith in God doesn’t produce key values in you that in turn commit you to certain parameters of moral conduct, such faith is a sham.
You might say that these decisions are not easy. I agree. Every significant change you want to make in life demands a certain degree of discipline. Let me at this point give some tips to facilitate our decisions in making commitments.
First, know what you are committing to. Always investigate before you invest. Commitments are usually for the long haul. Consequently, make them with your eyes open. Don’t make commitments and later start giving excuses for non-performance. Destiny is a marathon, not a 100-meter dash!
Know your “I WILL”s. By that I mean, distinguish between what you wish to do and what you need to lock your will into. Every desire is a mirage until your will is locked in. There are many “I wants”. Want is an expression of what you lack. “I want..” simply means ‘I have a desire to..’.
“I will..” on the other hand expresses a DECISION to do something about what you want! A million intentions are no match for ONE quality decision. Intentions may generate ideas but only decisions create events!!!
Keep your vision constantly in view. Never take off on a journey and forget the destination half-way! Distractions, no matter how attractive, are always costly to focus. Don’t live the life of one beating against the wind. Time is only a fraction of eternity given to you to do an eternal work. Minimize the non-essentials. You may not have too many friends (in fact, some of the ones you currently have will become irrelevant when your priorities change) but you will make great impact. In a football game, the players know that winning a match has nothing to do with how much they can dribble. It is about the number of goals scored. To score goals, the focus is not the scoreboard but the goalpost. They leave the scoreboard to spectators while they (the players) determine what is reflected on it! If you have problems keeping your eye on your goals, maybe you need to start keeping a VISION BOARD where you can map the journey of your life
Furthermore, learn to live by priorities. Unless you are a virus, you cannot be everywhere. Your name is not Omnipresent. Stop competing with God for that title. Unclutter your life so that you don’t carry an excess baggage of involvements without commitment. The mackerel fish lays about half a million eggs each time it lays eggs. What this means is that it cannot ever be committed to its offspring. You don’t have to accept every engagement or join every group you are invited to. Life will offer you two pathways; the way of PREFERENCES and the way of PRIORITIES. 95% of people live by preferences, doing only what they find convenient and comfortable, not what they NEED or HAVE TO do. Very often, URGENCIES manifest as NEEDFUL. When we react to every urgency, over time, people with no plans for their lives will start making their own emergencies become your priorities. If you must live a disciplined life, you must know that “NO” is a complete sentence!
Commitment makes it needless for you to swear because people around you know that your ‘Yes’ is ‘Yes’ and your ‘No’ is ‘No’. Many will despise you for it. However, you only have peace of mind when you know that life is not a popularity contest. The only competition you have is yourself. Little minds do many things at the same time with minimal, if any, impact while great minds do few things or even ONE thing with the greatest impact. The choice is yours.
In addition, identify, minimize and in fact, ELIMINATE as much as possible, DISTRACTIONS. Potiphar’s wife in Egypt was very attractive and highly influential. But she was a distraction to Joseph’s destiny. Thank God he recognized that. He could have compromised and got a change of wardrobe and an enhanced diet. He could even have been promoted to prominence in Potiphar’s house beyond what his master had already done. But if he was jailed being innocent, think about what would have happened if he was caught in the act!
If your life is governed by certain core values, those values help in a significant way to narrow your options. Have a values compass. If you are a man of your words, you don’t make many promises because your word is your bond. Sycophants, bootlickers and people-pleasers cannot live a life of integrity! Commitment to your spouse simply means you cannot allow conversation with a member of the opposite sex go beyond certain boundaries set by your values. It also means that the space you allow yourself to be in with a member of the opposite sex must be guided and guarded.
According to the philosopher Socrates, the undisciplined life is an insane life. Operate a schedule for daily activities. Trust God as if there is no plan and then plan as if there is no God to trust. A planned life is based on HOPE. My favourite definition of hope is that it is the dream of a soul that is wide awake. Planning is your roadmap to the destination that you have seen. Set goals and plan accordingly. Goals are your eye into the future. Planning is your blueprint to accessing that future.
Finally, have at least one accountability partner for your commitments. Even if you are in school, have friends that you study with and who will constantly put you on your toes and remind you of why you are in school. The common trend in school is to associate with people who are as complacent as you rather than those who are more brilliant and can challenge the mediocre in you. It is for this reason that many brilliant students hardly have many friends. But your destiny is too important not to look for the company of such students that those who cannot match their brilliance derogatorily refer to as nerds. After lectures, sit with them to compare notes about lessons learnt. Let iron sharpen iron. Get insights from yourselves beyond what was taught. Share experiences and how your learning applies to your lives. Mentors are also accountability partners. Whenever you make a commitment or you are about to make a commitment in any significant area of your life, appoint a “policeman” to monitor you and ensure that you comply. It is not about teleguiding. It is about responsibility via accountability. If you are in a relationship with anyone who lives like he is not accountable to anyone, RUUUUUUNNNNN!!!! Anyone who cannot be accountable cannot also be relied upon to be responsible.
When commitment becomes an investment into your future, the dividends are out of this world!
Remember, the sky is not your limit, God is!
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