WHAT is your growing up like?
I want to believe my growing up has to do with where I am today because it was not on a platter of gold. I never knew my father until I was sixteen years old. My mother told me that my father promised to marry her but along the line, she got pregnant. My father accepted the pregnancy but did not marry her. This prompted her to nurture the pregnancy alone and even after delivery, she nurtured me till I was 16 years old when I eventually met with him. My mother had to remarry so I lived alone in a house rented for me by her. But I thank God because he saved me at that tender age of 16; I got born again. If not, probably today, I would have been one of the prostitutes on the roads. I started my businesses at the age of 18. I made soap, composed poems (Ewi), etc. The entrepreneurship culture I imbibed at that early stage is still helping me. The unpalatable background I had motivated me into going among the youth. I have passed through that stage and I didn’t fail God so they can also live and not fail God. It’s about what you want from yourself, not your parents, government or Nigeria. I saw my circumstances and I told myself that where my father and mother failed, I will not fail. To the glory of God, I am now a role model to many.
What has life taught you?
It has taught me to beat it hard. If I don’t ask from it, it will not give me. I am violent in possessing what I know is for me. I don’t wait for life to give me goodness; I go to life and say ‘give me goodness.’ Another thing I have picked is that I don’t go to God to give me what I can do for myself. I know what I need the super being for. Also, I have learnt that I should dominate life not the other way round. Life has taught me again to be responsible to anything that comes my way. You can advice me irrespective of who you are but I will go back and take my own decision that I will be accountable for.
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What motivated you to start a television broadcast?
I observed in the trend of my ministry that everywhere I go, people feel intimidated. Number one reason is that as a woman, people believe you should keep quiet where men are talking. So any time I’m in their gathering, they picture me as their wives at home. Meanwhile, I am not a woman they kept in their house but an independent person and more so somebody else’s wife who must fulfill destiny too. My husband has understanding too that though I’m a wife, I must fulfill destiny too. So when I find myself among them, they may not want me preach . They bench me and sometimes even when they give me opportunity to preach, they want me to talk their own mind. But I cannot talk men’s mind rather God’s mind because it affects people. they have problem with me being a woman and carrying auction. With the challenges I was facing, I kept asking God who my audience are and the platform I would reach out to them. About two years ago, God said to me “I want you to go to a television station and I said “Daddy, I don’t have money.” I told my husband and he asked where I would get money. I told him that I do not know but God just asked me to start. So I asked God to give me my audience so it won’t be as if I’m competing with anybody. That is the genesis of the TV programme.
Why do we have divorce on the increase and what can we do to stop it?
Wrong choice is another reason for broken homes. Faulty foundation too is responsible for divorce as people have removed God from their choices. Even our parents in their ignorance knew how to consult God and that is why they made it in marriage. The Bible says “when the foundation is faulty, what can a righteous do?” In such instance, the righteous should carry his cross. You are already in the marriage and the best way to manage it is to give him his food and bed and that is all. In most marriages today people went into it because the man can buy material things not for spiritual reasons. When you marry your own wife or husband, whatever error occurs in the journey, there will be cover up. Expectations and parents’ interference are other reasons for increase in divorces. However, to avoid divorce, make sure you marry God’s mind and your own lifestyle. Let’s be more tolerant because the marriage is not solely about you but both of you.
How are you combining your career with the home successfully?
Number one is priority. I let my husband know that he is my priority. So if you know that marriage is your priority, wage war against anything that may break your home. There will be times your career is conflicting with your home, ask yourself what you want. As a pastor, there are spiritual exercises that I should be doing to help my ministry which includes fasting. If I start fasting and my husband request for sex, I will break the fast. That is wisdom. It is because the home is there that people are calling me to come and minister. When people want to get into business with you and find out that you are a divorcee, it downgrades you and the business may not be successful.
Tips on how to have a successful marriage
From the angle of a woman, if you can just do two things which are managing your husband’s table and bed, your marriage will be successful. As a woman, don’t be too religious that there won’t be food on your husband’s table or you won’t be available on his bed. An average man uses sex as relieve. If you can solve these two problems, people will say you have cooked special vegetable for him. Let your husband be somewhere and be thinking of you. In addition to this, you cannot manage your man’s bed when you don’t dress well. Give yourself good package because there must be something that attracts him to say that you should unzip your clothes. As per managing table, give him the right food at the right time, be with him when he is eating, dish his food warm and present it well so that he will have a drive to eat. Be his people. Whatever interests him should interest you. Give him listening ears too. Lastly, as much as possible, defend your husband always and love him with his weakness not his strength only.
What are your enterprises all about?
At Vniks Consult, I do business therapy for business owners. We deliver papers on establishing businesses, share business ideas, and solve staffing problems. I do human resources work-employing workers for companies, etc. This involves answering all ‘how to’ questions for business owners. We develop entrepreneurship centers too. At Vniks Nigerian Enterprise, we produce bags, T.shirts, sandal\shoes, printing works, etc. Under the Total life Concept Ministry, we run our ministerial work which involves pastoral spiritual counseling, deliverance, marriage counseling retreat and revival. Then we have our NGO as Ultimate Total Life Concept Initiative where we give help youths awareness such as economic awareness, political, academic e.t.c .We also work among the corpers. I’m a pro-entrepreneur. I don’t want people to finish school and be looking for job. So I preach self reliance, job creation. I don’t preach job consumption. against looking for job.
Advice for youths
They should not shift responsibilities to their parents, government, or anybody. Take responsibilities on your life. They should also pass through process and don’t compare. Aside this, they should remember that today is the foundation of tomorrow. Therefore, avoid corruption because whatever a man sows, he will reap. Position yourself well for good things. Youths should be creative, package well and should not write themselves off irrespective of challenges they face. Above all, seek God first in all you do.
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