Self-worth and intimacy are often sculpted by the weight of societal norms, creating a landscape where personal struggles can feel overwhelming.
“True healing begins when we stop fighting who we are and start listening to what we need,” says Nikita Fernandes, LMHC, CST, who has made it her mission to help individuals shatter the pattern of negative self-talk and foster a gentler, more compassionate inner voice.
A highly sought-after therapist specializing in self-esteem, intimacy, and multicultural therapy, she is committed to enabling her clients to embrace their vulnerabilities instead of hiding them.
Born and raised in Bangalore, India, Fernandes grew up in a multigenerational household, where she gained a deep, personal understanding of the challenges tied to identity, relationships, and cultural expectations.
Her journey into therapy was deeply personal: “I was always the friend people came to for advice, and it felt natural to move into a field where I could formally support others,” she recalls. “Taking courses in feminist theory and multiculturalism deepened my understanding of the systemic factors that influence relationships, intimacy, and mental health,” she explains.
This guided Fernandes’s view on therapy not just being a profession. For her, it’s a calling rooted in personal experience and deep cultural awareness. This is why Fernandes is a trusted therapist for clients navigating relationship challenges, self-worth struggles, and identity conflicts. “One of the things I love most about my work is holding space for people in a way that allows them to embrace their full humanity,” she shares.
Her therapeutic approach integrates evidence-based practices with a deep appreciation for her clients’ unique identities and experiences. She believes healing is a collaborative process and strives to create an environment where clients feel empowered to explore their relationships, desires, and personal growth. “Therapy can be intimidating, and I want my clients to feel that they can show up as their full selves.”
Whether addressing intimacy challenges, exploring identity, or helping partners strengthen their connection, Fernandes’ work is rooted in empathy, inclusivity, and a belief in the transformative power of therapy.
A Human-Centered Approach to Self-Worth
As an expert in intimacy and relationship therapy, Fernandes has worked extensively with individuals and couples to address attachment challenges, self-worth issues, and emotional barriers that impact their relationships. At the core of her work is humanistic therapy, a client-centered approach that empowers individuals to view themselves as worthy, capable, and deserving of love and connection.
“I often see clients being incredibly hard on themselves,” Fernandes explains. “They internalize societal expectations, cultural narratives, and past relational wounds, leading to a harsh inner critic. My goal is to help them shift from self-judgment to self-compassion, so they can truly embrace their worth.”
Fernandes’ approach combines traditional psychotherapy with feminist and multicultural therapy. She recognizes that systemic influences, such as gender roles, cultural expectations, and societal beauty standards, deeply affect self-esteem. By addressing these broader contexts, she helps clients reframe their beliefs about themselves in empowering and authentic ways.
Her commitment to fostering inclusive and affirming spaces has earned her the respect of both clients and colleagues. Dr. Dulcinea Pitagora, a psychotherapist and supervisor, has worked alongside Fernandes in various professional settings and describes her as “a passionate psychotherapist and sex therapist who adheres to strong professional ethics and demonstrates insightful self-awareness in her work.”
As Dr. Pitagora recalls it: “Nikita has this incredible ability to build trust and connection, especially when working across different cultural backgrounds. She’s insightful, trauma-informed, and genuinely committed to creating an inclusive and affirming space for her clients.”
Rewiring the Inner Dialogue
For many people, self-esteem struggles stem from deeply ingrained negative thought patterns. Whether rooted in childhood experiences, past relationships, or societal conditioning, these patterns often manifest as relentless self-criticism and self-doubt. Fernandes helps clients identify and replace these harmful internal narratives with more supportive, affirming self-talk.
“Many of my clients come in with an inner voice that tells them they are not enough, not attractive enough, not successful enough, not lovable enough,” she says. “Through therapy, we work on recognizing where these thoughts originate and, more importantly, challenging their validity.”
One of the primary tools she employs is cognitive restructuring, which encourages individuals to question and reframe negative thoughts. She also incorporates mindfulness and somatic work, helping clients develop a stronger mind-body connection to break cycles of self-judgment and cultivate self-compassion.
Fernandes’s academic background laid the foundation for her expertise in mental health and sex therapy. She earned her Master of Arts in Mental Health Counseling and Wellness from New York University’s Steinhardt School of Culture, Education, and Human Development. She also holds a Bachelor of Arts in Psychology from George Mason University, where she graduated Summa Cum Laude, concentrating in Clinical and Developmental Psychology with a minor in Women and Gender Studies.
The Intersection of Intimacy and Self-Esteem
Self-esteem and intimacy are deeply interconnected. Many of Fernandes’ clients struggle with self-worth issues that directly impact their romantic relationships. Feelings of inadequacy, fear of rejection, or discomfort with vulnerability often create barriers to emotional and physical connection.
“Low self-esteem doesn’t just affect how we see ourselves; it affects how we show up in relationships,” Fernandes explains. “It influences how we set boundaries, express our needs, and allow ourselves to experience intimacy.”
In romantic relationships, self-esteem plays a crucial role in managing desire discrepancies, body image concerns, and trust issues. Fernandes provides couples with the tools to foster secure attachment styles, encouraging open communication and mutual validation.
Experts like Fernandes, are recognized for their ability to create safe, affirming spaces for clients. Dr. Ernesto Lira de la Rosa, a Licensed Clinical Psychologist and Clinical Assistant Professor, praises Fernandes’ empathetic and insightful approach to navigating complex relationship dynamics.
“Nikita has an incredible ability of making her clients feel safe and understood,” says Dr. de la Rosa. “Her deep knowledge of attachment styles, sexual health, and emotional intimacy allows her to truly transform how clients approach relationships.”
What sets Nikita apart is her ability to bridge the gap between research and real-life application. “She doesn’t just provide therapy; she educates,” Dr. de la Rosa adds. “I’ve seen her lead workshops where she fosters open, welcoming discussions around intimacy, relationships, and communication. She has a gift for making these concepts both accessible and actionable.”
One of Fernandes’ key areas of expertise is helping clients reconnect with their bodies, particularly those who have experienced trauma, internalized cultural messaging, or past negative experiences: “Reclaiming one’s body as a source of confidence and pleasure is essential,” she says. “Our work focuses on rebuilding that connection in a way that feels safe and empowering.”
A Multicultural and Inclusive Perspective
Fernandes’ work stands out for its multicultural and feminist perspective. As a South Asian therapist, she is among the few professionals offering culturally competent care in the field.
“There aren’t enough South Asian therapists to meet the needs of the South Asian community, especially in areas like intimacy and sex therapy,” she explains. “Many of my clients are working with a therapist who truly understands their cultural background for the first time, and that’s incredibly meaningful to them.”
A Licensed Mental Health Counselor and an AASECT Certified Sex Therapist, Fernandes specializes in helping individuals and couples navigate the complex relationship between self-esteem and intimacy.
Her practice serves a diverse range of clients, including BIPOC individuals, LGBTQ+ clients, and those engaged in kink or non-monogamous relationships: “I work with a diverse range of clients, but my practice tends to attract people between the ages of 20 and 50,” she notes.
“Many of my clients are people of color, immigrants, or come from multicultural backgrounds. I also work with individuals and couples navigating issues related to gender identity, sexuality, and intimacy.”
Her holistic approach addresses concerns such as desire discrepancies, body image struggles, and trust issues, many of which are deeply influenced by self-perception. She also helps clients in intercultural relationships bridge communication gaps and understand how cultural influences shape intimacy and expectations.
“Partners from different backgrounds often have different ways of expressing love and varying comfort levels with vulnerability,” she explains. “I help them recognize these differences and work toward a mutual understanding.”
Fernandes’ work goes beyond therapy; it’s a source of support for those who’ve long felt overlooked. By creating a safe, culturally aware space, she helps her clients embrace their identities towards the path of building stronger, more meaningful relationships. For many, working with Fernandes is the first time they truly feel seen, and that moment of understanding can be the first step toward deeper self-acceptance and connection.
Helping Clients Break Free from Shame and Judgment
A significant aspect of Fernandes’ work is helping clients overcome shame, whether related to body image, past experiences, or societal conditioning. Many individuals enter therapy feeling disconnected from their needs, desires, and emotions due to years of internalized judgment.
“I often tell my clients, ‘Healing is not linear,’” she says. “Just because you have setbacks or moments of self-doubt doesn’t mean you haven’t made progress. It’s all part of the process.”
This is why her approach blends Eastern and Western therapeutic perspectives. “Traditional Western therapy tends to focus on cognition and behavioral modification, but I incorporate mindfulness, somatic work, and a holistic understanding of the mind-body connection,” she explains.
By integrating affirmation-based therapy, mindfulness, and emotional processing techniques, Fernandes helps clients move from self-criticism to self-acceptance. She encourages them to become aware of their internal dialogue, challenge negative patterns, and develop a kinder, more compassionate relationship with themselves.
A Highly Sought-After Leader in the Field
Beyond her private practice, Fernandes is widely recognized for her contributions to intimacy and relationship therapy. She has been invited to speak at major conferences, including Something Positive for Positive People and South by Southwest (SXSW), where she has led discussions on the intersection of mental health, sexuality, and self-esteem. Her groundbreaking work in relationship therapy has earned her prestigious accolades, such as the ASECT Emerging Professional Award and the Change Maker Award from George Mason University.
Committed to expanding access to mental health care, particularly for underrepresented communities, Fernandes is currently focused on developing low-cost support groups and community education programs. Her goal is to make high-quality relationship and intimacy therapy more accessible to those who need it most.
At the heart of her work is a dedication to bringing a multicultural perspective to therapy. “Many individuals from marginalized communities don’t feel fully recognized in traditional therapy spaces, and I want my work to change that,” she says. “I also want to be known for my curiosity and my willingness to integrate my own lived experiences into my practice. Having lived between two cultures, I bring a unique perspective that helps my clients navigate the complexities of identity, relationships, and self-worth.”
A Message to Those Struggling with Self-Worth
When past wounds make trust and connection feel out of reach, Fernandes helps people find their way back. Thanks to her holistic and empathetic approach, numerous individuals have rebuilt their relationships, rediscovered their self-worth, and embraced a future filled with love and understanding. By making therapy more accessible and inclusive, she ensures that no one has to navigate their healing journey alone.
For those grappling with self-esteem issues, Fernandes has a powerful reminder: “You’re not broken. The way you talk to yourself matters more than you think. And guess what? You have the power to rewrite your own story. Self-compassion isn’t some luxury; it’s something you need. Your worth isn’t tied to what others think of you. You deserve love, the real, deep kind, from yourself and from the people around you.”
What sets her work apart is not just its effectiveness but its deeply human approach. Whether helping clients through life transitions, intimacy struggles, or cultural identity conflicts, Fernandes ensures each session leaves them feeling seen, understood, and empowered.
“I want to change the way people speak to themselves,” she shares. “I see it all the time, so many of my clients, and honestly, people in general, are way too hard on themselves. There’s too much blame, shame, and guilt in the way they process their experiences. My goal is to help them cultivate self-compassion. Healing isn’t just about resolving external conflicts; it’s about changing how we relate to ourselves.”
Her philosophy is clear: Setbacks don’t erase progress. Every step, even the difficult ones, is part of the journey.
With expertise, compassion, and an unwavering commitment to inclusivity, Fernandes is redefining what it means to heal. Her work goes beyond therapy; it’s a movement toward self-acceptance, deeper connections, and lasting transformation.
Part of healing is realizing that you were never truly alone. And with Fernandes by their side, countless individuals are learning that they are, and always have been, enough. She offers hope for those who feel lost in their pain.
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