The act of parenting goes beyond the reproduction of young ones. It has to do with being involved in every aspect of a child’s development and growth. The alarming rate of increase in the perpetration of heinous crimes such as kidnapping, rituals, cybercrime, and others boils down to the lack of effective parenting in our society.
Discussed in this article is what effective parenting is and qualities of effective parents.
What is effective parenting?
Effective parenting is the act of being concerned and involved in every stage of a child’s growth with the aim of training them into mature and responsible adults in the future. The need for effective parenting in today’s world is obvious even to the blind as some parents have left their duties to teachers and caregivers, not knowing that no one can effectively fill the position of a parent in the life of a child.
Qualities of an effective parent
Love
All humans respond to love regardless of the age. Your children should always be assured and reminded of your love for them.
All you do for your child must have love as its basis even when you intend on correcting them for their wrongs or excesses. You don’t necessarily have to beat a child to correct them.
In a bid to show love to your kids, you can get them gifts to celebrate them even when it’s not their birthday and reward them for their little successes.
A child that love has been communicated to from a tender age will find it easy to reciprocate love to others.
If this can become a trend in most and if not all families in our society, then the society will become one characterised by love and not violence.
Communication
The need for effective communication between you and your child cannot be over emphasized. You should build up a strong bond with your child such that they see you as the best person to speak to whenever the need be. You should not become so busy that you don’t create time for one-on-one discussions with your kids.
Children who have parents who don’t have time to communicate with them often fall prey to the wrong hands in the public space.
As a parent, the best gift you can give your child is communication, where you listen without criticizing and in the long run you are gifted with the trust of your child.
Trust
As a parent you need to earn the trust of your child. Children have their peculiarities.
This means that what you do to gain the trust of one might not work for the other child. So, you need to discover how you can gain the trust of your child.
Make your children see you as the number one person they can trust with their little secrets.
To gain the trust of your child, you should not judge them or be the first person to nail them to the cross for their mistakes. Rather you should constantly remind them that you will always be by their side through thick and thin.
Be a good role model
Actions they say speak louder than words. The world we are in now is one in which our children do as we do and not as we say. Whatsoever you desire in your child should be seen in you by the child.
You should not be the one teaching against lying and yet in your conversations on the phone the child can hear you lying about whatever you’re discussing.
You need to become the change you wish to see in your wards. In the words of Jim Henson, Kids don’t remember what you try to teach them. They remember what you are.”
Support
A child’s number one fan should be the parent. There is a kind of confidence that is birthed in a child when they know they have the support of their parents. They put in their very best because they would never want to disappoint you.
Is your child going to be competing in a race, representing their school in a competition or showcasing their talents soon? If yes, squeeze out time from your busy schedule and go support and cheer them up.
Create time for your children
Your children need adequate time with you especially in their formative years. This is because whatever they learn at this stage is what becomes a huge part of their person when they become adults.
You should not neglect your children because of your job, career or personal aspirations.
You can make out time for them during weekends or during their holidays for those in boarding schools.
You can do this by spending quality time with them either by taking them to parks, cinemas, making some pastries at home, visiting relatives, going to eateries or other fun places in a bid to make them know that you can never get too busy for them.
Note this:
Effective parenting goes beyond providing the basic needs of your child. It has to do with being involved in every aspect of your child’s life. When the pillar of effective parenting is upheld in our society then we will all experience the change we desire in our society.
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