Investing in parenting coaching over the past 15 years has been a huge vocation for me. This is the profession I have dedicated my life to offering guidance, support, and wisdom to parent coaches with a view to help other parents and families navigating the ever-challenges of raising children. One of the veritable mediums I have used so far to propagate this profession has been my weekly articles which have been a foundation of this effort. My publication has provided a steady flood of advice and encouragement to my parenting coaches community and readers alike. However, a few weeks ago, I made a difficult decision to take a break from my regular writing routine. I needed this break because in-between this weekly articles, I launched my latest book on fatherhood, entitled; ‘PATHWAY TO FATHERHOOD’ in November 25, 2023. PATHWAY TO FATHERHOOD is a book illuminates the mind of fathers on how to access 7 keys to unlock greatness in fatherhood. So, contemplating this decision was driven by a mix of personal and professional factors because of a burnout as a resulting of hectic activities I have engaged in the past one year, hence the need for self-reflection, and the desire to rejuvenate my creativity. In the midst of this, what I didn’t anticipate was the profound impact this break would have on me, both as a family and parenting coach and as an individual.
I am writing this article to share some lessons I have learned during this break. I learnt the importance of self-care and the surprising benefits of stepping back. My experience so far has been eye-opening and transformative. I want to encourage parent and family coaches to take serious how to balance the demands of work and personal life, I hope my journey can offer some valuable insights and perhaps even inspire you to consider the power of taking a break.
Though my decision to want to take this break from writing my articles was not without some doubts about the fear of missing out of actions of what is going on in the parenting and fatherhood space. I was also confronted with several unexpected difficulties; such as sense of guilt; a week into the hiatus, a thought raised through my mind in one breath, I felt like I was letting down my loyal parent coaches who I write for, and they also rely on my weekly articles for wisdom, guidance and support. This guilt was reinforced by an irritating fear of losing my audience entirely. When you think about the large following, you will not but be concerned about possible declining readership and losing touch with my parenting community.
At a moment, calls from some parenting coaches flooded in, they were asking what has happened to their darling weekly column. At this juncture, I was worried of any convincing response that will douse the tension, then I began to doubt my decision, I questioned whether taking a break was right after all. How will I even gain momentum when I returned? I asked out loud. All these were initial challenges that were also emotionally draining, but they also set the stage for deeper reflection and growth
While at this, I realized I had not been effectively monitoring our son Akinlolu’s studies and this cause for serious retrospect from me as I was able to provide support for him during his preparation for his West Africa School Certificate examination that was to start in late May, 2024. The break really turned out to be a blessing in many ways than I initially imagined. This crucial period in his academic journey required my full attention and support. You can imagine the imminent struggle I would have faced if I were still caught up in my weekly writing routine. Being present for him during this crucial time not only strengthened our bond but also allowed me to experience firsthand the challenges and triumphs that parents face. This truly enriched my perspective and equally broadened my orientation as a parenting coach.
My experiences during this break have put a moral compass on me not to keep the challenges and prospects of taking break off one’s ritual activities. In the light of this, I will like to share first, with parent coaches, challenges of not taking a break from your professional duty.
- The first challenge I noticed was the lack of quality time for the family I lead. It was this moment I realized that being on constant work can ultimately lead to missing important domestic family engagement which can cause regrets and a weakening family bonding. Children will feel the absence of parental support and this may lead to strained relationship if it goes unchecked
- Personal health matter cannot be overlooked. Our work as parenting coaches is time demanding with respect to various researches involved. But we must not forget that long hours and stress without adequate rest can lead to health challenge; headache, fever, sleeplessness, and hormone malfunction.
- Work Inefficiency also set in. paradoxically, overworking can lead to decreased productivity unknown to us because fatigue reduces efficiency and ability to remain focus. If I didn’t know this before, my experience during the break proved this to be true
- During the break, I discovered that absence of leisure time is a major issue with many professionals. Without leisure time, there is little opportunity to engage in activities that bring joy and relaxation. Overwork will lead to a monotonous life, frustrated life, and decreased creativity in all areas. Parent coaches need to pay attention to the importance of leisure time because it is crucial to maintain a healthy balance between professional responsibilities and personal mental wellness.
I write this not with the intention to make parent coaches focus on the inherent challenges of not taking a break from professional activities but also to let them make periodic holiday as a culture and not as an intervention. The following are the benefits parent coaches stand to get from making holiday a culture.
- I came back rejuvenated after the break with enhanced creativity and innovation on my job. I gained fresh perspective that provided for me a broader space that helps me see issues beyond my worldview thus creating new sparks and insights that clients can rely on.
- Improved mental health. I had the opportunity to visit regularly my physician and fitness therapist who collectively helped me to break low stress levels and their instructions have promoted better mental health and prevented imminent burnout
- I gained tremendous professional growth and development. During this break, I had the opportunity to visit my coach, who after assessing me, opened me up for self-reflection and I realized I needed to upskill, unlearn and learn new expertise. He introduced some books and researches for me. It was during this time I stumbled on a work of Dr. Adam Grant, a renowned organizational psychologist who has done extensive work on effectiveness of taking periodic break to yield high productivity.
- Mental rest aids clarity thinking. This is my personal experience of the benefit of taking a rest as it helped me to clear my mind which ultimately led to better decision making and problem solving abilities among my team in the faculty.
- Your social interaction and networking will be greatly enhanced when you meet and sit with new faces who are not your regular professional colleagues. Breaking off work for a period can be beneficial both personally and professionally.
I urge parent coaches who are yet to imbibe the culture of taking a break off their routine to do and make it a long term commitment as this will prevent fatigue and disillusionment. I conclude this article with a profound insight from Dr. Adam Grant, a renowned organizational psychologist and professor at the Wharton School of the University of Pennsylvania. In one of his writings, Dr. Grant has discussed the importance of rest and recovery for maintaining productivity, creativity, and overall well-being. His work often highlights how taking breaks can lead to better performance and increased job satisfaction.
Akinropo Akinola is the visionary founder of Parenmark Consulting, a pioneering parenting and fatherhood initiative based in Lagos, Nigeria. As a leader in private field research, Akinola is driven by a passion to revolutionize the art of parenting and nurturing African children. Through Parenmark Consulting, he is dedicated to enhancing the quality of parenting and family life by providing expert education and guidance for Parenting and Family Life coaches across Nigeria and Africa.