Why do women hide their age?

If you call am woman /African woman no go gree

She go say… She go say I be Lady o

She go say I no be woman/She go say market woman na woman

She go say I be Lady…

I never tell you finish… I never tell you…

She go want take cigar before anybody/She go want make you open door for am

She go want make man wash plate for her for kitchen …

—Fela Anikulapo-Kuti  – (Lady)

IN modern societies it is often seen as impolite or outright lack of disrespect to ask a woman of her age. On their own part, women themselves, – well…, most of them – do not want to mention their age for different reasons. Naturally women seek eternal beauty and youth which, practically speaking, is not possible. Women to all intent and purposes link age with eligibility for marriage such that a woman in her early thirties and still single may not want to disclose her age apparently for fear of being found out to be out of the game of courtship.

This is not to mention cases of age falsification very common within the civil service where people die just after their retirement when they are actually over 70 years old, while ‘officially’ they were only 62.

However this is not to say that there are women who are not ready to disclose their age. Some even look much younger than their age, a compliment most women would love to hear.

A dental-surgeon assistant, Adeshina Adebisi while speaking on the issue said: “This is common among we females, but deep down I think it is because we want to feel secure. Sometimes if I am in good mood I am eager to tell people my age and if I am not, I would attempt to decline doing so. I cannot even tell my colleagues at work my actual age. I remember a colleague asked me some month ago, “Bisi, how old are you? I was like hope no problem, what do you want to use my age for?

“It depends on what each person wants to use the age for. If the person is still working, or is yet to marry, she may be hiding it or reducing it. I, personally, right from my youth, I don’t play with my age, even when I apply for a job as a civil servant. I was 23 as of then and thank God now, I am above 50 years.”

Chief Mrs Borode Omotayo, a civil servant is of the view that a woman lifestyle can however reduce the signs of ageing. This, she says is possible If she monitors her food intake, exercises regularly, avoids direct contact with the sun for long hours and avoid smoking and alcohol.

“The reason for age-hiding might be based on something related to relationship, if I was older than a guy and I love him, I would not want to let him go because I was older than him. I will have to reduce my age so as to make the relationship work out. At work, most employers do have specified age for consideration for employment and if you are desperate about the job, the option there is to reduce your age. Apart from that I think women have this innate desire to be appreciated and admired and in order to feel loved, they hide their age,” she said.

A student, Miss Nnebedum Amaka, is of the opinion that women even take risks to look younger.

“Women even go to the extent of spending a lot of money on cosmetics and anti-ageing products to appear younger than their actual age. Older women want to appear as attractive as when they were younger so that they can make men twirl at their appearance, especially when they are single and older.

“That is not sufficient for some women, as they spend needless money undergoing plastic surgery, from breast implants to nose lifts, cheeks filled out, pumping their lips and their obliterating their wrinkles using minimally invasive cosmetic procedures.

“It is important to mention that, lying about age is not restricted to women but it is a ‘Nigerian thing’. It is also practiced by the men, especially to secure employment. In other climes it could be women but in Nigeria it is both sexes.

“Women around the globe attach importance to being young and beautiful because of men. Men appreciate women that are young and beautiful than women that are older. The fact is that beauty goes in tandem with youthfulness and so even when women are getting older, they prefer to live in denial and still want to feel they are young and beautiful so they conceal their age.

“It is the same reason why they go for dresses that make them appear younger than their real age and buy all manner of cosmetics and undergo plastic surgeries to complement that and look young and beautiful,” she said.

Mr Abdulkareem Yusuf, a lawyer says there is no law backing age hiding and I think it is just for vanity sake because they want to appear younger than they are. I will advice those doing that to abstain from it because there is no reason to be afraid of your age, everybody is expected to age.

This act of women hiding their age affects women who naturally even appear older than their actual age, to the extent that when they tell their real age to people, they still don’t believe them.

It was also observed that, it is uncommon for a man in his 40s or 50s to have interest in a woman in her forties. Most men prefer woman who are much younger, who are still fresh and beautiful.

In the kind of world we find ourselves now, the older women are competing with their female counterparts, who are younger; in hunt for jobs and better relationships. Some even go the extent of concealing their real age so as not to be demoted at their place of work.

Aisha Ajekigbe, a female lawyer responding to this situation says, “There is no law backing it up, it’s a thing of choice and based on personal perspectives. I tell everyone my age and it’s on all my credentials.”

She also adds that, “people hide their age because of their jobs most people see hiding their age as an advantage ,most people also hide their age so as to be able to partake in the youth service programme or being able to secure a job that regards an age range.”

She further stressed that “in a relationship perspective if anybody lies about their age and their partner gets to know there will be no trust in that relationship any longer because if you lie about your age the way you think, talk and reason will showcase how old you really are, that is, your level of maturity. The person may lose her job if her employer gets to know her real age. It is rampant everywhere as football player also use football age.”

She concluded by advising women that hide their real age “It’s advisable to tell their real age because what works for one person might not work for the other. There is no much to tell them because telling their real age might not work well for them .they should do what they think is best for them.”