ONE major activity in marriage that cannot be successfully delegated is sex. You cannot send someone to help you have sex or give sex to your spouse. If you do, it’s an abnormality that will eventually destroy the marriage. It’s also an activity that is mutually beneficial to the two persons in the marriage. Both husband and wife enjoy it, when sexual intercourse takes place. It’s also an activity that is freely permitted between husband and wife, and it can be engaged in without anyone raising eye brow. I mean, no one can query them as to why they are having sex. It’s expected of them to have sex. Like a man said during one of our marriage seminar, “the reason husbands marry their wives is to be able to enjoy sex without restrictions.
However, despite all the above, it’s been the experience of many married couples that sex becomes scarce in marriage, at some points in time. The wives, especially, are usually the culprits here, in most cases. The excitement wanes, and it becomes a struggle getting her to have sex. So, the husband begins to complain, wondering what is exactly the problem with his wife.
When this happens, what is the way out?
It’s been also discovered that there are moments in the marriage, when the parties don’t have to struggle for sexual intercourse. It flows freely, with little or no begging efforts. The couple just get into the act so easily. So, when sex becomes scarce and unavailable as it should or used to be, couples should rekindle the moments that sex flowed easily and freely, in an effortless manner. Cast your mind into the past, and remember those moments that you had sex freely, and begin to rekindle such moments, and sex will become readily available, all over again.
Free flowing sex moments in marriage
- When married couples have been apart for some time, they miss each other, and whenever they come together after a period of time of absence, sex flows easily. I have noticed that when my husband and I are away from each other, whenever we come together again, sex is usually the first thing on our minds. We don’t discuss or woo each other for it. Rather, we just do , and do it well. So, it’s one of the things you can do when sex becomes scarce in your marriage. Travel for a few days or weeks, and by the time you are back, he or she is longing to have you naked, at the slightest opportunity.
- Gifts spoiling moments
It’s one of the experiences in relationships, especially marriage, that when you give gifts to your partner, sex is easily provoked, and readily made available. When you buy gifts for your spouse, it elicits emotions, such moments are when sex becomes readily available. It’s like pouring water on the ground, so that you can walk on soft or wet ground. After all, one good turn deserves another. When your spouse becomes evasive in bed and stressing you in order to have sex, go get the favourite gifts, especially for her. Oh my God, you will be amazed at her ready reactions in bed.
- Being extra ordinarily there for your spouse
Just doing nice things for your spouse usually provokes him or her to be at his or her best, with you, including in the order room. Get him dressed up for work or an outing, give her surprise breakfast in bed, pick up the school bill for the children occasionally, help her do dishes, etc are some of such niceties couples can do to each other, that make sex readily available.
- Be intentional about a peaceful home atmosphere
When you quarrel often, sex is made difficult in the marriage. You have to go the extra mile to make sex happen. You must deliberately work towards a crisis-stress free marriage, if the bed must shake regularly. When you are unhappy in the marriage, sex becomes a routine that becomes forcefully enforced. This does not bring about mutual satisfaction. Instead of having fun, it’s pain you experience.
- Home alone moment
When a couple is peacefully alone in the house, sex becomes inevitable. No distractions of children and their issues. Such a moment give room for regular, free sex in the marriage. So, couples should plan weekend alone, or get away weekend, as often as possible. Anytime sex becomes scarce, the husband should find a way of either clearing the house of children and live in hands. When my children were growing up, we usually sent them to grandma to spend some time with her. Such time alone with my husband, gave us frequent sex acts, without restrictions or complaints of not being in the mood. Once we are alone, I know we must shake the bed vigorously. So, my body chemistry align itself for it, effortlessly. Alternatively, you can do a weekend trip, and the experience will be the same.
Intentionally creating moments like the above will not only ensure that there is no sex scarcity, but makes room for great sex escapades between a couple in the marriage.
My Book Enjoying Great Sex Life is still available for sale. Contact 08112658560 for details.
S FROM NIGERIAN TRIBUNE
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