It is normal to have little arguments with your partner. This is because no relationship is perfect and you are both wired differently.
Aside from this, you are both from different backgrounds and were raised differently by different parents. This might shape your views on various things.
However, you need to take caution when you both have little differences. As humans, we tend to blurt out hurtful words and angry at each other. You should remember that our words are like eggs. Once it falls, it is usually very hard to pick it up again.
In this article, you will find issues you should never bring up while in an argument with your partner as a couple. You should read this and also share it with your spouse and other couples.
1. Your past mistakes
Most couples are expected to have discussed various past mistakes with each other. This is because of the level of trust and confidentiality both couples ought to share.
However, mature couples are not expected to bring up past mistakes whenever they are in disagreement with their partner. Avoid reminding them of their past especially when they’ve turned a new leaf. The past mistakes should be left in the past.
2. Your weaknesses
This is unhealthy for your relationship, especially for married couples. Hitting yourselves with words to weaken each other isn’t the right thing to do.
Most couples use their partner’s weakness as a tool to hurt them during arguments. They know it weakens their partner’s defence and that is the best way to shut them up. This could be a win for you at the moment but be rest assured that you are losing your partner gradually.
You are meant to cover up each other’s vulnerable sides or even secrets. Bringing it up in heated situations makes your partner hide more under their shell.
3. Previous arguments
Bringing up dirt from the past is not ideal for every relationship.
Celia Schyewer, a relationship expert says after an argument has been talked about and resolved, it should be trashed in our mind, never to be dug up again. Bringing up issues from previous arguments can be very hurtful for your partner.
Focus on the topic and avoid referring back to previous disputes and differences.
4. Using genetic similarities
Telling your partner they behave exactly like their parents, sisters or any relative is very hurtful. Using phrases like ‘you are just like your father, mother, sister, or brother is not only an insult to them but also to their close ones. This could create more damage than you can ever handle.
No one likes to be compared with negative things, so there is no way your partner will overlook this. It is a big slap on their face and even their relatives.
No matter how angry you are, resist the urge to blurt out these hurtful words. It causes more pain than you can control after the argument.
5. Threatening to leave each other
This is a topic that should never be mentioned no matter how serious the fight might be. Words like this are always too expensive and would reduce the level of trust you have for each other. No relationship is a walk-through without constraints, differences and challenges. But your way of handling it when it arises is very important. It can either strengthen the relationship or destroy it.
Never bring up the issue of you going apart whenever there is an argument. It is extremely dangerous for the relationship. It puts your relationship at risk.
Using words like “I wish I never married you,” “I want a divorce,” “I don’t care if we went our separate ways,” “I can live life without you,” “I don’t need you” destroy the foundation of your relationship.
You must have noticed topics, words or statements that offend your partner. This shows you understand them so you need to stay clear of these whenever an argument comes up. Hope you found this helpful.
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