The word ‘rape’ has become so mainstream to us that its usage is now nearly colloquial, and about two million females have being raped at a point or the other in their life (this only an estimate as most victims do not report cases) and while in most cases it is a singular case, a lot of women by virtue of fear of stigmatization become continuous victim of rape. A pastor’s daughter going for an evening programme will surely be dressed in a godly manner, this cancels out a stereotype that only scantily dressed ladies are raped, there is no statistical proof to show that this is the case, although underdressing can tempt and lure would-be rapists, a new bone of contention lies in rape that occurs inside the marital institution; of course that cannot be reported to law enforcement agents, but we do know that they occur.
While rape can occur in both gender, the female case is more pronounced, elaborate and is tied to clinical conditions, as a result discussion as regards rape cannot be overemphasised. The United Nations estimates that about 3 million females have been raped world over. While the figures may look exaggerated to some, I feel that it may even be conservative. There are enough reasons to believe that there are much more unreported and undocumented cases of rape. We can always place the blame on someone or something else, for instance, the ladies that dresses indecently. But have you ever stopped for a moment to ask yourself as a man: is it the immoral dressing that really coaxes a rapist into action or there was something else? How about decently dressed ladies who have been raped too? It’s all down to the desires of the mind.
Have you ever wondered what becomes of the victims of this ungodly act? 40 per cent of females who end up hating sex have been a victim of one form of rape or the other, the other percentage account for females who have been mutilated, or who have had a previous sexual experience. By effect victims of rape go on to endure their marriage instead of enjoying it, bearing in mind that sex is an integral part of the marriage. Another issue directly linked with rape is sexually transmitted diseases. Since most rape are done without protection and the perpetrators of this heinous crime do not commit to one sexual partner, there is a huge risk of being infected with various sexually transmitted disease, with several other sexual related disease being discovered daily, some extremely life-threatening, a victim of rape will be doing herself (in this case) a great service by running a thorough check up as soon as possible after the incident.
But all those are just palliative measures. Can we really just take down the cancer source instead of dealing with mutated cells? Can we tackle rape itself and wipe it out? While that is a huge question, the answer is a simple and comforting yes. With all hands on deck, we can. Men should stop seeing women as sexual objects made for the gratifying of their lust. It is high time we all realised that women are human too and then we must take proactive steps in respecting their decisions and stand by it.This implies that a husband will go to bed without forcing himself on his wife simply because she is tired after the day’s stress, we will all be considerate about each others needs.
Strong, iron-clad legislation should also be put in place to deter offenders. Perhaps the reason the menace is still here is because the law has treated it with kid gloves for too long. We can each make the decision to make our community a sane place, to treat girls and ladies alike with respect. After all, we make up the community. Rape can be eradicated, I believe so. This narrative can be changed and together we can.
- Adeleke writes in from Ibadan.
and then