How recession has affected our marriages —Couples

As the world celebrates World Marriage Day today, Oluwatoyosi Omisore and Rukayat Odewale spoke to couples and a counsellor on how Nigeria’s current economic state is taking its toll on marriages.

MR Solomon Olaniyan, speaking with Sunday Tribune, stated that “The effect of the current economic recession could be said to be both negative and positive. Positively, it has helped my family to be more committed to judiciously managing our resources. As much as possible, we try to avoid wastage of resources that are not even enough. Similarly, the current economic hardship teaches my family to pursue only the needful, while we do away with the so-called wantful. On the other hand, the current economic crisis has telling negative effect on my marriage. It is difficult to meet up with some financial responsibilities. For instance, payment of house rent, electricity bills, etc., has not been regular compared to when there was no economic recession. Moreover, as a father it is not easy to carry out fatherly roles. How does one provide food for members of the family when the pocket is almost empty? As a matter of fact, scarcity of funds can make any responsible and responsive man to become grumpy. Nevertheless, in spite of the current economic recession, my family has been enjoying the progression of God’s provision and faithfulness.”

Mr Akinola Eyitayo said: “It has affected me on a personal level, not just as a family unit. I am a civil servant I am also involved in some craft but this recession has really worsened matters. We have less income but the expenditure is higher. To eat a good meal is difficult for the family and this has really affected the state of my marriage.

Mr Ayodele Paul, in his comments stated that recession had had an advance effect on his family. According to him, “the government promised us heaven and earth but now we are seeing the opposite side of their manifestos; this shows that our government is not capable. We can’t afford three square meals again; my business has run down. In fact, my health has been affected and you can only imagine the toll it is taking on my marriage.”

Olalekan Adekanbi told Sunday Tribune that “I am highly disappointed in the government but at the same time not disappointed because I was expecting this to happen. Things have been really difficult and my marriage has, no doubt, been affected but I believe all is well.”

Oluwole Odunayo, who stated that he was a tailor, noted that drop in patronage has made him unable to meet up with his role as the head of the family.

Another respondent, Temitayo Oluwole, stated that “Recession has affected my marriage negatively. I am burdened on a daily basis with how to feed my family, school fees, transport fees, among others, especially as my wife and I are not paid well. My prayer is that God visits Nigeria before things get out of hands.”

Mrs Latifat Taiwo said: “Things have not been going on well since this recession drama started. In fact, if it is possible to skip food, I will because everything has become more expensive and I fear I may develop hypertension soon. It has affected me because I can’t take care of the family like I used to do. My husband doesn’t complain before giving us feeding allowance before, but now, he complains and gives what he can afford, even if that can barely cater to our needs and I dare not complain. Things are really hard I must say.”

Sunday Tribune also spoke with a marriage counsellor, Mr Abraham Ojekanmi, who suggested ways couples could cope with the economic situation.

According to him, “Marriage is an integral part of the society, so whatever affects the society at large will affect the marriage, whether positively or negatively. Presently, there is recession as the government has pronounced it and everybody is feeling it. To be realistic, it is affecting marriages in the sense that the family budget has to adjusted according to the available funds. Practically speaking, there are some wives that have become disgruntled about the money they receive for foodstuffs and some women have gone to the extent of denying their husbands sex as a result of the effects of the recession. That is the truth. However, there must be understanding between husband and wife. With what is happening now, I tell men that when you have, let your wife know you have, so that when you don’t have, she will understand the situation. They should also understand that what is affecting the country and organisations will definitely affect the home. The most important thing wives and children must demonstrate is high level of understanding. It is just a matter of time as things will become better soon.”