Let’s reimagine parenthood in a changing world

THAT’S a fascinating breakthrough: science has once again leapt. Indeed, what God cannot do does not exist! Australian researchers’ recent success in producing the first kangaroo embryos through IVF (in vitro fertilisation) is remarkable. As I read the story, I could not help but see the hand of the Almighty in all of this. It is as if humans are continually uncovering what has been concealed. But beyond the marvel of science, this story stirs up a deeper reflection—one that touches the hearts of many Nigerians struggling with infertility. It remains wrapped in societal expectations, cultural norms, and religious convictions. In our world, where lineage and biological reproduction are seen as unshakable pillars of self-worth, what does it mean when one cannot conceive the “natural” way? Why do we struggle to embrace alternate paths, especially when we can afford it? I am grateful for a few friends and associates who have boldly embraced surrogacy and IVF as the means through which they welcome their long-awaited children. They have chosen hope over despair, possibility over stagnation. Yet, I cannot ignore the weight they carry—not just the emotional and financial strain, but the quiet or sometimes loud judgment of a society that views alternative parenthood as an inferior route. To those who are waiting, hoping, and believing, I acknowledge your longing. I do not take lightly the pain of expectation. But I invite us all [whether in the waiting or watching from the sidelines] to pause and reflect. What exactly do we desire “more”? Is it the child we deeply long for or the validation that comes from being seen as parents?

I do not stand here as a judge declaring what is right or wrong. As a fellow traveller on life’s highway, I urge us to reexamine assumptions that diminish the worth of those who, for one reason or another, cannot conceive naturally. A person’s value is not measured by their ability to bear children. All people have worth and self-dignity accorded by their humanity—not by the labels that culture imposes on them. As I reflect on this, I am reminded of the biblical story of the prophet Elijah, who drank from the brook Cherith until it dried up at an earlier instruction. The drying of the brook was not a punishment nor a sign of divine abandonment—it was a call to move, to seek provision in a new place. God, who once provided water through the brook, also made provision in Zarephath. Could it be that we are being invited to a new instruction? Here is what we know! Science is advancing, the world is changing, and knowledge is increasing. The breakthrough with kangaroo embryos via IVF shakes our belief in divine power. That same wisdom provided pathways for human conception many years ago. Are we so bound by cultural expectations that we miss the new places God might be showing us?

Whether you’re a believer, sceptic, or someone in the middle, miracles are more than events. They are invitations. They beckon us to step closer to the Divine, to trust in something greater than ourselves. Miracles don’t exist to resolve our problems. They point us toward the bigger picture, the story of God’s love and involvement in our lives. They invite us to trust His bigger plan, even when we can’t see the full picture. Miracles are incredible, but they are not the destination. They are the doorway to something more profound: a relationship with a God who knows you, loves you, and invites you into His story. If you’ve experienced a miracle, celebrate it—but please don’t stop there. Ask what it reveals about the God who performed it. If you’re still waiting for a miracle, don’t lose hope. Even in the waiting, God is working. As we wrap up, remember that the true miracle isn’t about healing, provision, or the breakthrough—it’s what that experience might be showing you. Every miracle reminds us that God is not distant but intimately involved in our lives. At least, that’s what I see.

It’s the invitation to live differently—to see the world through a lens of faith, hope, and grace. And this invitation is always open, no matter where you are on your journey. Whatever happens, to all who believe and desire to have children, may it be unto you as your heart longs. And to those who may never bear children, know that your worth is not diminished at all. You are whole, you are enough, and you are deeply loved—just as you are.

• Ukoh, an alumnus of the American University of Nigeria, Yola, is a PhD student at Columbia University, New York.

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