Is it right for a lady to propose to the man she loves?

In a culturally sensitive society like Nigeria, the options available to a woman when it comes to certain relationship matters are either limited or questioned. The possibility of a woman initiating an intimate relationship with a man or proposing marriage to him is slim and may be considered embarrassing in some quarters. GIDEON ALABI and IFEOLUWA ADEYEYE sampled the opinions of some people on this matter. Their views:

Success Ighomi

If a woman chooses to express her love by proposing to a man, she must also possess the emotional maturity to accept that his answer may be no. Love is an invitation, not an obligation. The courage to confess one’s feelings should be matched by the grace to respect another person’s freedom to decline. Just as society expects women to have the right to reject a man’s proposal without guilt or condemnation, men deserve that same autonomy.

Genuine love honours free will — it does not demand reciprocity simply because affection has been expressed. Therefore, if we advocate the normalisation of women proposing, we must equally normalise a man’s right to decline without being vilified or pressured.

Making her interest known is the better approach. By expressing her feelings, she opens the door without compelling anyone to walk through it. She gives the man the clarity to determine whether he shares her interest — and, if he does, the opportunity to pursue the relationship with conviction, purpose, and genuine intention. If he is interested, he would naturally make his move. That initiative becomes a deliberate expression of his own desire rather than a response to external pressure.

Grace Adeifa

A lady can express her interest or even propose to a man she loves, provided it is done sincerely and without pressure. What is most important is the mutual feelings. Although traditionally or culturally, it is expected that men should initiate proposals or relationships, which are built on mutual love, respect, and communication. What matters most is that both people freely choose each other and are equally committed to the relationship.

Most ladies might not be able to directly propose to the men they love, but they can express interest to him. I mean, ladies have a way of signaling feelings to someone they love, but it is up to the man to detect and do what is necessary about it.

Omoniyi Omotehinse

A lady can absolutely propose to the guy she loves.  Love should not be based on gender, and should not be one-sided. For too long, we have allowed culture to trap us with the gods of gender-based proposal, this idea that only the man must kneel, only the man must speak first. That mindset is outdated. If you are a lady and you love your man, and you are sure of your heart and your intentions, then go ahead and make the move. Your courage does not make you less of a woman. It makes you honest.

The truth is, sometimes, the guy is not emotionally ready, or he is unsure, and that keeps the relationship on hold. But when a lady takes that bold step, it could trigger clarity. It can push him to do the needful and decide. At the end of the day, love is about two people choosing each other. Let us kill the bias and embrace love that is mutual, intentional, and fearless.

Daniel Goodness

Once it is done with honesty and courage, it is fine. If a lad tells a guy about her feeling and he too is interested in her, as far as the feeling is mutual, then why not?

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This is 2026. We do not have to make love gender-based. Many ladies like a guy and let them go because they were not able to approach him. Meanwhile, the guy likes them too but thought the lady would not accept their love. If you like a guy, forget the cultural belief that says a guy must approach a lady first.

Faith Ifedayo

A lady can propose to a man. It shows confidence. Proposing could demonstrate honesty, courage, and a willingness to take initiative. Love is mutual. If a woman is sure about her feelings and wants to spend her life with someone, expressing that commitment is just as meaningful.

Whether it is right for a lady to propose to the man she loves depends on personal beliefs, culture, and the couple’s values; there is nothing inherently wrong with it. Love, commitment, and mutual respect are shown as long as the two love themselves and are ready to achieve one goal, which is love.

Dorcas Aliu

It is absolutely right for a lady to propose to the man she loves. Love is not gendered. If you are sure and you respect each other. Courage matters more. If you know what you want and you love someone, waiting just because the guy should do it can make you miss out. Courage should count more than tradition.

A lot of relationships are now built on partnership, not on the old rules. If a lady is confident and ready, proposing shows intention and honesty. Some guys are shy, unsure, or scared of rejection too. A proposal from a lady can actually make things clearer for both people.

Adedokun Abdullah

It is perfectly normal. There is nothing wrong with a woman proposing to a man she genuinely loves. Love and commitment are not determined by who asks first. What matters most is that the people involved in the relationship are serious about it and ready for the commitment. I mean, she can absolutely do the whole proposal herself. There is nothing wrong with a woman taking that step if she genuinely loves the man and is ready for commitment. What matters is the love and sincerity behind it. I think love makes things easier for everyone. If two people genuinely love each other, I do not think it should matter who proposes first or how it happens.

Iffy Ikechukwu

Honestly, I do not think it is right. I am not saying the lady is wrong for having feelings or knowing what she wants or being the goal-getter, which is fine. I believe the man should lead. That is how I see it. If I love a woman, I want to be the one to step up, be the one to take the risk, and tell her how I feel and not her doing it. That is part of being a man to me.

If a lady proposes to me, I would feel like something is off, something is wrong. Sometimes, I would even feel she has a wrong motive. And it is not really about ego; it is about the natural order of things. The man pursues, the man leads. If she likes me, she can show signs, give me green lights. But she should let me be the one to make the move. That is what I believe.

Oluwapelumi Akintoye

As a guy, it is acceptable for a woman to propose to a man she genuinely loves. For example, I have seen a case where it was the lady who called the guy to tell him how she felt about him. A healthy relationship is built on mutual respect, honesty, and shared commitment, not on rigid gender expectations.

While cultural and religious traditions in some societies may favour men proposing, there is nothing wrong with a woman expressing her desire to spend the rest of her life with someone she truly loves. What matters most is that both individuals freely consent, communicate openly, and respect each other’s values. Every couple should make decisions that align with their beliefs and circumstances rather than feeling pressured by social stereotypes.

Olusola Obalola

Nigeria is actually a gender-biased country because there is nothing that is supposed to be wrong with it normally. But the kind of environment we find ourselves in has made us think that the marriage proposal act is for the male gender alone. Love is shared between two people. So, why is a marriage proposal for one party?