ONE cannot overemphasize the negative effect of busybodies on many marriages that have been destroyed. If I begin to count the losses on marriages, the list will definitely be inexhaustive. It keeps growing daily, and the only reason it is so is simply that many couples have not learnt from the experience of others. They are either ignorant of the effects, or misunderstand them, or misinterpret them, or simply a case of levity in handling the situation of busybodies. Whichever is the case, it is an undeniable fact that busybodies are time bombs which must be detonated, if marital harmony will be sustained, and the divorce rate drastically reduced to the barest minimum.
Who are busybodies?
They are simply gossipers. They exist virtually in every Institution of the society. They operate with both good and bad intentions, but whatever the intention may be, busybodies have negative impacts on societal Institutions. This is because they tell the half-truth, which they have time to hear, before running out with the “breaking news” . That is why in my clan, the busybodies are said never to “ wait for the whole story before running ahead with hall truth”. I am sure that many people will agree that half-truth is not only bad news but simply dangerous to the recipient. This is why they are so deadly in their effects.
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Concerning marriage Institution, the effects are not different from the above-established fact. Busybodies operate generally also either on falsehood or half-truth. I have personal experiences of the activities of the busybodies, as well as those of others who have fallen victims, or survivors of the activities of the busybodies.
The following represent some of the activities of the busybodies based on couples experiences: these are the seeds busybodies sow around that negatively impact on marriages.
- A woman told a husband that his wife’s last quarrel was consequent to the wife’s intention to dump him for another man. The husband applied wisdom as he informed his wife, and in the end, the woman’s move turned out to be mischievous
- A friend told her friend that the challenges she was facing in life was because of the husband her friend got married to. If her friend was not experienced, it would have ruined her wonderful marriage.
- I know a couple who operates in the opposite with respect to the traditionally established roles in marriage. This means that husband enjoys cooking, washing clothes etc, while the wife enjoys ironing clothes, driving cars, even for long distance, and the like. Busybodies started sowing seeds that are against marital harmony in the marriage. The accusations bother on perceived abuse of each other by busybodies who don’t know why the couple operates the way they do.
- The insinuation that a woman always sends her husband to buy items in the neighbourhood shops, while she sits at home doing nothing. Busybodies don’t know that the wife is the one in charge of all other household chores, which the husband doesn’t enjoy handling.
Like stated earlier, the list seems endless. I dealt with that of spiritualists busyness last week. It is required of couples to be wary of the activities of the busybodies as a way to protect their marriages from problems of marital harmony, and by extension, total collapse. The watchword here is wisdom, which has been defined by many as the application of knowledge. Let couples apply wisdom in handling what others say to them, or to others about their marriage. We must tread with caution to avoid crashing.
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