The Alaafin of Oyo, Iku Baba Yeye, Oba Lamidi Adeyemi 111 is a great lover of this column and one of its oldest fans since its debut in 1998. Many atimes, we engaged in lengthy discussions on my submissions here, with him offering astonishing insights into areas that were shroudy on the surface. Immediately after the publication of the piece entitled With this dagger I thee wed, Kabiyesi called to dissect it as usual and offered to rejoind some of the assertions therein. Even though it would be an aberration in Yorubaland for a son to vacate the stool for his father, today, I step aside on this podium for Kabiyesi, one of the most cerebral kings I have known, to offer us his insight which he entitled Reinventing Yoruba values. Thanks and have a fulfilling week.
While I have never been surprised by the characteristic scholarship which my son, Festus Adedayo, has always invested in his Flickers’ column, I am however thrilled by the depth of the one entitled, ‘With this dagger I, thee wed’. It is for this reason that I feel obliged to reinforce his scholarship with my own royalty.
Two institutions that have been afflicted with the social disease called modernity are the family and religion. Let me start from the family system. In the original African/Yoruba system, the line that separated the nuclear and extended family was very thin. The extended family played a supervisory or monitoring role on the nuclear family as a parent body. The family played a vital role in the process of contracting marriage for its children. It used various traditional means to enquire into the prospects of the proposed union. Sometimes, members went as far as at least two generations of their proposed in-laws. In a nutshell, marriage used to be between two families.
It was also part of the system that, before a new wife was properly absorbed into the marital values, her elders or seniors in the family which the Yoruba call ‘Iyale’ would induct their latest colleague into the acculturation process, including the core values of her new home.
At that time, the institution of mother-in-law was very sacred and sacrosanct. The new wife saw her mother-in-law as her own real mother, with all courtesies and deference. But what do we have today? In some cases, prospective spouses do not even contact their parents for advice before accepting offer of marriage with whom they might have met, whether on campus or any social gathering. They just pick a date to bring their bride or groom to their parents. Most of the time too, the parents are handicapped from any expression of reservations, lest they are accused of witchcraft.
Let us now examine the role of religion, both old and new. In the past, there used to be a family church spanning over one hundred years to which the family belonged. Under that process, the family values had virtually been absorbed into the c hurch values and teachings. The pastor of the old church used to instill respect for parents, especially the mother, into the children, right from their infancy. At that time, the Bible was the reference point and guide to members. The old pastor harmonized relationship between the child and the parents, without any pretension on the part of the pastor to usurp the functions of the biological parents with the artificial status of ‘Daddy’. But things are different in the so-called modern time. In some modern families, even wives and husbands attend different churches, with their children too scattered into different modern day churches all over the corner. The result is that, within a nuclear family, there are three or four churches with conflicting teachings and values. Some new couples prefer taking their domestic problems to their ‘Daddy’ in the Lord, instead of their biological parents whose natural role has been usurped by the new spiritual ‘Daddy’. Most of the time, children are not taught in the way of Christ through the Bible but by the whims and caprices of ‘Daddy and mummy’ in the church. Unfortunately, the versatility of these modern day pastors is not in the Bible but in their ability to mesmerize or in the fluency of the Queen’s English that proceeds from their mouths.
In the Muslim world too, we now see various sects, some of which come with anti-social practice of what original Islam preaches against, like ritual killings and other mortal sacrifices. How can one explained the rationale behind a modern Shehu abandoning his family for up to three months or even more, under the guise of Hijra, wandering aimlessly around the bushes? What kind of children can one expect to grow under that system? No wonder therefore that we find some so-called ‘elehas’ (women in purdah) in prostitution, driven out from purdah by hunger.
What then is the way out of the modern day brigandry that has enveloped many families of today? The first is for the family to go back to the original form where the nuclear family complemented, rather than alienated the extended arm of the family. In other words, couples must never forget their roots. Secondly, parents should not abandon their traditional role on their children to either religion or any educational institution, especially in the formative years, through the nursery system. As much as possible, modern parents should restrict the speaking of English Language by their children to schools alone. In other words, they should not allow the nursery education system to deny them their original role of child socialization. Apart from encouraging them in the speaking of Yoruba language at home, they should also imbibe in them the core values of Yoruba customs and heritage.
How many of our modern day parents can relate prostration by men and kneeling by women with respect for elders? To many of our ‘alakowe’ children, this gesture of respect for elders is nothing more than mere physiotherapy. Do their parents even encourage them to prostrate or kneel down for them in the morning? To modern parents of today, that act is the primitive aspect of our culture.
It is for this reason that I recall a recent outing in Ibadan by Egbe Atunbi Yoruba where I had the honour of being the Royal Father of the day. When I saw the composition of the group, I concluded that all hope is not totally lost about the future of our youth. Former Vice-Chancellor of the Premier University, former Chief Executive Officers of different famous newspapers and erudite journalists, among others are members of this group. Beyond encouraging our cherished customs and tradition, one of these is the sanctity of human lives which, by Yoruba custom and tradition, is held in high esteem.
Our religious bodies too i.e. Islam and Christianity should also purge themselves of bad eggs. There should be minimum training before one can be called a pastor as was in the past. In the same vein, there should be an established ladder a Muslim must pass through before being called Shehu.
It is very worrisome that most suspects in police custody today are either self-declared pastors or roadside Sheiks. It is indeed an irony that all the evils which traditional religion worshippers have abandoned are now found in the hands of pseudo Muslims and Christian ‘preachers’.
- By His Imperial Majestity, Oba Lamidi Olayiwola Adeyemi III, CFR LLD, The Alaafin of Oyo.
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Re–President Ayo Fayose
You can be sure I was overwhelmed by the sarcasm woven all through your piece, right from the title – “President Ayo Fayose” – in your column. This was beautifully displayed in your brief (laconic) assessment of our erstwhile national leaders. Indeed, the narratives were very apt, pointed and fitting. The following are particularly fitting (made-to-measure) to the respective characters: “the highly mercurial Murtala Muhammed”; “the highly contemptuous-of-the-other-person Olusegun Obasanjo”; “power-drunk Ibrahim Babangida”; “Papa Doc Sani Abacha”; that Goodluck Jonathan would have been thought to have faked his PhD. degree; that in spite of each of them being seemingly a misfit for national leadership, they were selected or elected as national leaders of Nigeria over the years; that “if Fayose joins the league, it fits the Nigerian paradox very well” – a subtle indictment of the citizenry.
Bravo! I doff my hat to you, although you seemed to have been sympathetic of Umaru Yar’Adua, and you seemed to have chickened out on Muhammadu Buhari!! Ha ha ha! More potent ink to your golden pen!
Again, l was simply bemused by the longish rejoinder of one Femi Odere to your earlier write-up in your column. My initial thought was that the man was satirical, but reading through the piece, l concluded that he must have been psychologically impervious to the happenings around him, or he is a hack writer. Or does a Yoruba adage not say, “Bi a ba n sunkun, a maa n riran”? (even while crying, we still see). I note with dismay that most of his assertions with which he attempted to refute or disparage your stand-point were with no empirical evidences. Very unfortunate! Finally, and honestly, that harangue has tended to strengthen my feeling of pity and sympathy for you columnists, considering the darts and barbs (or is it “artillery missiles”?) that usually get thrown at you people from time to time, and often without much justification.
- Olaitan Makanjuola ([email protected])
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Re–Nigeria: Fatherland as murderland
All you’re your write-ups are down to earth as usual. More power to your elbow. I want to react to Nigeria: fatherland as murderland. The level of murderous activities in Nigeria and South Africa are so high because of failed leadership. In Nigeria, alienation of the people by government led to all the untoward activities. If they were catered for like the leaders of the First Republic did, crime will be minimized. In South Africa, independence has not redistributed the wealth of the nation which was hijacked by the Boers and later by the British since 1632. Although black is ruling the nation, economic power is in the hands of whites which has deepened blacks’ dependency on white, in a way more cruel than Apartheid days. Freedom has not transformed their lives, all denials of apartheid era still persist; limited access to education, health, loans, housing, employment opportunities and so on are still on. The violence resulted
to is an outcrop of dissilusionment in their system. Xenophobia is led by those without quality education which can give them gainful employment and live good lives. Then foreigners, particularly blacks, who had good education and good jobs or those with foreign capital who dominate trade and other economic concerns, are seen as usurpers and are objects of attack. Redistribution of wealth which is like hunting for snow in a blast furnace, may do the magic of turning that nation around. Xenophobia against Nigerians could have been minimal if Nigeria had maintained its leadership position in Africa. Political instability, coupled with inept and unexposed leadership, is her albatross. Efforts of Nigeria in ending Apartheid regime in Southern Africa is enough for that country to worship Nigerians. However, Nigeria’s myopic and illiterate policymakers erased her past by banning the study of history in our schools, thereby, banning the exposition on the knowlege of Nigeria›s past lofty roles in world affairs which should have been made part of Nigeria›s heritage and internationalized. How would South Africans read about Nigeria›s role in the emacipation of their nation which Apartheid-induced curricula never make a course of study? Honestly, one cannot blame our leaders for removing history from our curricular. What they tried to do is to keep off record their acts of savagery. Or how would their future generations feel when then read about the evil perpetrated by their forebears?
Claude Ake›s Disarticulation Theory is the main curse afflicting sub-Sahara Africa and only an articulate leadership can remove that curse. But where is the articulate leardership when pyrates are feasting on the wealth of the nation perpertually for personal aggradisement, in a wicked manner never heard of in feudalist Europe, without hope of ceasing, and the governed, bearing the brunt of bad government endlessly looking unto the hills for help?
- Adewuyi Adegbite, Ogbomoso, Oyo State
and then