Dear Yemisi,
First, I want to thank you so much for your column. I am a foreigner, but I have enjoyed reading your column for a long time. I am from Zimbabwe.
My problem is that I have a girlfriend that I have been in relationship with for seven years. All this while, I can tell you that I have never cheated on her even for a single minute.
Some days ago, I received a text message from her and it read “I DON’T LIKE SEX EVEN FONDLING” and the other text that followed read “WRONG TEXT “.
I confessed that l already had sex with this girl. When I asked her who the recipient of that message was, she kept quiet and said sorry.
Another problem is that she has introduced me to her parents, and deep down my heart, I am beginning to doubt her sincerity. I am afraid of the fact that in the not too long time, I shall stay with a child who did not belong to me.
What can I do?
Dear Yemisi, please, rescue me before I am dealt with.
Nastro.
Dear Nastro,
Your reservation about this lover of yours is understandable. Though what she mistakenly sent to you might have infuriated you, that has even called her sincerity with you to questioning, I will urge you to still believe in her to some extent.
This can be hurting, as you have claimed that you have not for once cheated on her in the last seven years, but nobody can lay claim to perfection as only God is perfect. I think you should overlook her mistake as she had realised that she did not do well by appearing to be in another amorous relationship with another guy in spite of your sincerity to her.
Her keeping quiet in answering your query but to say sorry goes to suggest that she missed it somewhere. There is a saying in Yoruba that once an accuse knows that he is guilty, he will not tarry defending a wrong cause. But come to think of it, the content of the message to me is nothing serious that should call for a second thought about her sincerity.
If she had gone all out to introduce you to her parents, I think this should be enough evidence that she will at no point hurt your feelings. This honour to me will always serve as a check whenever she feels like betraying you.
You are supposed to be in charge of your affairs at every point in time and if the feeling that she will one day disappoint you keeps coming up, I will suggest you give her a break as well as review what has cost you since you started dating her and if in the end , you still doubt her, please, calling it quits with each other should be able to lay to rest the feelings of insecurity as you have expressed.
Please, do the needful before you are dealt with.
and then