THE lifelong institution called marriage has always witnessed men proposing to ladies; but the latest trend in the society is moving away from this age-long tradition as women are taking the bull by the horns to propose to their male partners. This might not seem strange to many although it goes against the convention backed by religious practice in this part of the world that a man would leave his parents to cleave to a woman and they become one. Proposing marriage is an open request from the men to women , it ordinarily involves the man begging for an affirmation or negation as to a new lease of life together. However, with the recent trend of women proposing marriage, would you accept a lady’s marriage proposal and why?
On WhatsApp Conversation, these are what those who joined the conversation and our expert said on the issue:
The act of acceptance will depend on whether she is the kind of person who I am prepared to spend the rest of my life with, there is no problem in such act. The world has advanced and we must take note of that. According to the scriptures, God proposed for Adam and even when Adam saw her, he didn’t propose which means the appearance and content of both complemented each other. In the same scripture, the act of Ruth towards Boaz could also be likened to a proposal. If there is love and their characters complement each other, no problem with that.
Accepting a lady’s marriage proposal to me would be out of pity and to appreciate her effort, which is actually meant for the guy to do. It’s a civilized world, but tradition forbids it. When a lady needs a man to the point of forever, her character would speak for her and she would be noticed as long as she is always around the guy.
A proposal is a bold step that shows more than just ordinary interest in a partner. We must note that money plays a major role in relationship/ marriage. The foundation of such marriage matters. A steady income is a priority too and if she can propose and promise that she will cover all the bills without rubbing it in my face then we are good to go.
Yes, I will, if I’m sure her intention is right and she is someone I also cherish so much. In our world today, a lot of people take nasty decisions out of desperation and societal criticism. If I’m sure she’s not under duress and I’ve always wanted to be with her, I will. However, the society recognises that it should be done by the male and I’m sure that’s because of value. Whoever will not place value on a woman will not and whoever will, will surely do, without being taught or told how. Whether proposal is done by a woman or man, it doesn’t make any difference. As long as we’ve always wanted to be together. It’s just too cool.
Yes, I can and I will. But it is based on certain variables. One of them is if I feel exactly the same way about her, but if I don’t then no. For me, it doesn’t matter who proposes to the other as long as we both feel the same way about each other.
Amami Joseph Chukwubueze
I don’t see anything wrong when a lady makes a proposal. It doesn’t make any difference whether it is the lady or the guy that made the proposal but what really matters is, whether they both love each other and want to spend the rest of their lives together. It’s just our societal ideology that makes it to be wrong. Just as it sounds weird or wrong when a lady takes a guy out or when a guy cries because of a heartbreak from a lady.
No, it’s not the place of a woman to marry a man. The world is full of different scholars who came up with their own opinions based or happenstance around them. To me, my manual is the word of God. In Genesis 2:24, it’s stated that a man will leave his parents and cleave to the woman not the other way round. I didn’t see a place in the Bible where a lady proposed to a man. It is wrong and I won’t accept it.
Kemi Akinbobola, a marriage and relationship counsellor is our expert on this issue. A guy who goes all out to propose marriage won’t stop at that. He will definitely plan for the wedding and the home which is the marriage itself. A man who has chosen not to propose is not ready for commitment. A lady who proposes marriage to a man has come up as cheap and desperate, she has lost her self-worth because the man would be the first to call her names when things begin to go sour. Such a lady will never be good for a man who is not ready for commitment. Such a guy has been put in a tight and unpleasant corner and would feel forced to accept something he is not prepared for especially if he is a ‘nice guy’ and does not want to turn her down. In my view, the dog should always go after the bone and never the bone after the dog.
Next week on WhatsApp conversation: Would you as a lady propose marriage to your partner?
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