A President and his household enemies

WHATEVER anyone may say, kudos should be given to Major General Muhammadu Buhari, president of the federal republic for remaining stoic in public, despite the domestic civil war, raging inside his bedroom, since the early life of his kami-kaze regime. Yes, I stan (as Big Brother brotherhood will say) with Punch newspaper on its decision to derecognise the civility of democracy espoused by the current national leadership of Nigeria, for being nihilistic towards universal values, particularly, of right to human decency. Buhari’s regime isn’t only dictatorial, its leading lights are a present and prevalent danger to themselves and Yoruba will say, eni ba te eti aso re mole, a fa telomiran ya (whoever would deliberately step on his/her own cloak, wouldn’t hesitate to shred anyone’s). I don’t buy the nonsense that since Punch supported Buhari for president in 2015, it should join those who had chosen ashen-silence, to live with an ant-infested firewood, brought “home” in 2015. There is something that is called buyer’s remorse. Yes, “converts” like Punch will suffer consequences, but it is better than eternally seeking a long spoon to dine with men who ape devil. The only snag is that as the undeniable industry leader, Punch should have carried others along, in making an industry statement. Who knows, the aftermath may exceed scorching point, with even a battle-tested veteran like Punch, needing industry direct allies. Yes, I trust the Nigerian media to stand with its own, but the camaraderie would have been stronger, taking such a landmark decision together and embarking on this marathon in togetherness. Don’t they say; stronger together?

Major General Buhari’s regime is known for an all-out, once it picks up a battle. Punch management can be certain that Bubu would not allow the “insult” from them, go unchallenged, the only way the regime know how to settle scores. For a leader that has gone away with the hitherto unthinkable including removing a sitting CJN with a worthless Tribunal exparte, the next three and a half years, would be an interesting season between Punch and Aso Rock on one hand and the regime and the Nigerian media on the other. My only worry is that while it looks easy to call the coming fight in favour of the regime, which arsenal, harbours all needed for an easy victory, coupled with having behind it, a history of deploying a submarine against enemy-mosquitoes, times like this in Nigeria of past years, were decidedly resolved in favour of the oppressed by the One who controls the breath of man. Can’t tell why the feeling is so strong that history may soon repeat itself.

There is this fable about Olusegun Obasanjo telling someone that his inner-man receives direct endorphin from having crises around him and combatants seeking him out for a slugfest. Is there anything of such in the spiritual DNA of Major General Buhari too? Does he get a kick from the waters around him always being troubled? You ask, who doesn’t want peace? Sadists enjoy pains, even if they receive doses in flashes, in the course of peppering others, only that what comes as a victory raucous laughter, always has this hollowness to it. You ask if one had rung such sinister holler around me, and I say check the usual badman of American movies and their demonic curling mustache and fat cigar.

But even men of war have their vulnerable sinew. Two examples come to mind; General Naaman and Dictator Samson; the former, a healed leper and the other, a conquered anointed warrior. Despite Naaman’s military successes, leprosy was his soft tendon. For Samson, the feared conqueror of nations, it was Delilah. Where does one put General Buhari here; a Naaman, considering his abating health challenges or a Samson, with an angry Aisha, hell-bent on having her way or handing her husband to gnawing vultures? Does the General’s current situation not even making him look a combination of both? Upon reflection now, 2015 seemed the year Brand Buhari went to the market naked, despite nicking the top prize he “killed for”, in 2011 and for which he turned a “street wailer” in 2007 and 2003.

For sure, the “appropriation” war between Aisha and the Dauras didn’t start in 2015 and the General must have managed it to the best of ability, until the “market place” mandate, blew everything in his face. It is easy to read the situation, especially his seeming inability to rein in his wife and declare him a weakling or sucker for beauty, like Samson, but Yoruba will say eni ija o ba, lo npe ara e lokunrin (you are only a real man when battle-tested). Many are savaging the General over Aisha’s tantrums today, whose matrimony isn’t only ruffled and crumpled but completely dismantled. But Bubu is primarily the harbinger of the opprobrium coming his way over the triangular Daura/Aisha/Garba’s garbage and other domestic mess being regularly smashed on his face, which incidentally used to be his selling-point pre-2015. I mean, you take a look at the General’s face and say, yeah mehn, this is the man for the rot. Unsurprisingly the unsmiling face isn’t scaring Aisha and not deterring her from descending into the gutters with her enemies; her husband’s heartthrobs. When women have you to the throat and want it out with phlegm, it won’t matter if your visage is that of the most dreaded Egungun and the General is now being derided because he has always projected a ramrod, steely persona, which Aisha is now scattering into smithereens.

Without doubt, filial love overrides sexual intimacy for the General and this is obviously rankling the scorned woman under her roof. The domestic problem is going to last the General the rest of his life, though Nigerians would get to know less of it, after office. But while it lasts in office, those who love the General and the nation can only pray that governance isn’t lost to it, even if Aisha is divorced or her husband goes ahead with the Humanitarian woman. You say, governance lost to a mere family squabble? No, that family isn’t just any other, it is the first family and the supposed head, is making critical decisions for the nation. Have you ever considered a man whose mind is torn by deep feelings?