Talking vaginal dryness

Hello Bosede,

Please I need your help! What causes dryness of the vagina? I have been experiencing this dryness during sex for some time, and I am very worried because it makes sex very painful for me. My husband is also getting worried because I have been using every possible excuse to evade sex in order to avoid the pain. Please, I need answers!




Dear Jane,

Thanks for contacting me. Truly, dryness of the vagina can really be an issue because of the pain it causes during the act of sexual intercourse. And it is only natural for one to try to evade sex if one doesn’t know what to do about it because no one enjoys pain. The understanding of the cause of this dryness is key to knowing how to solve it.

Two things are majorly responsible for vagina dryness:


  1. When the woman is not fully sexually aroused:

Sex for a woman is not an ‘instant’ thing. It is something that begins gradually and climax with time. Therefore, any man that will satisfy a woman sexually must be ready to spend quality time to prepare her for the act. Normally, the walls of the vagina stay lubricated with a thin layer of clear fluid. The hormone estrogen helps maintain that fluid and keeps the lining of your vagina healthy, thick, and elastic. When the woman is fully aroused, sufficient fluid is secreted to lubricate the vagina, making for easy penetration of the male organ during sexual intercourse. But when the woman is not fully aroused, less fluid is secreted, making for friction during intercourse as a result of the dryness of the vagina, and it will naturally cause her pain. It may even lead to tears.

Solution: Couples must have enough time for foreplay before the real act.


  1. Menopause

A woman who is in, or approaching menopause will also experience dryness of the vagina. At this stage, the body is experiencing some changes and the sexual organs are not exempted.

Vaginal dryness usually results from a drop in estrogen levels. A drop in estrogen levels reduces the amount of moisture available. Estrogen levels begin to decrease as menopause approaches. Vaginal dryness is common symptom of menopause — and close to one out of every three women deals with it while going through “the change.” It becomes even more common afterward. It also makes the vagina thinner and less elastic. This is called vaginal atrophy.

Solution:  Artificial lubricants such as K.Y Jelly, aloe vera gel, glycol based lubricant and water based lubricant can be rubbed on the male organ before penetration. However, lubricants such Vaseline should be avoided.


You can add value to your marriage through reading books. My books ENJOYING GREAT SEX LIFE and HOW TO MAKE YOUR WIFE ENJOY SEX AND ASK FOR MORE are good materials in this wise. Call 08112658560 for details.


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