Should distance among couples be a contention to their love?

LOVE is beautiful when shared. However, a relationship could be tricky when there is distance between couples. Distant relationships could make or mar many homes or partners. Hence, should distance among couple be a contention to their love?

 

On WhatsApp Conversation, these are what those who joined the conversation and our expert said on the issue:

 

Lanre Oseni

It depends on the understanding between the couple. Where it is intolerable between the two parties, the husband could take her to his place of livelihood. Same, if the man is uncomfortable. The husband could find a way to go to her. Where jobs would be negatively affected, the two could go ‘private’ instead of paid jobs.

 

Rey Ovie

No, it should not. As long as they are married and they love themselves, there should be openness and understanding between the couple. Reasons for the distance should be properly related to each other. Durability or longevity should also be considered according to 1st Corinthians 7:3-5.

There should also be regular communication through phone to keep the partners happy. And, here is where getting married to your best friend comes into play because you would both gist about anything while away and when you return home or one of you comes to visit. It feels like there was never a time you were apart.

Sandra Nwabuani

Distance should not be a contestation to love. But it could be if the couple is not mature enough to nurture their relationship in the right way. If couples are only thinking about the distance, how far they are apart, the time they spend talking on phone instead of having face to face interactions, they would think it would likely create cheating tendencies, lack of care or protection, or even limited intercourse. However, the more time we spend away from people is the only time we have to truly figure out if we love and cherish the one in our lives. Distance could only foil a relationship that is not built on mutual understanding. Distance is no barrier to love, if couples agree to be committed, they could achieve it. If couples agree to an open relationship as well, they could also achieve it. That is why a loving relationship is built on trust.

 

Rukayat Alabi

If there is smooth communication and understanding, it should not be a problem. This is not just between couples now, but between friends and families too. Communication goes a long way in averting disastrous situations. Therefore, if both parties talk regularly and vent too—trust me, we women like wahala sometimes—doubts arising as a result of distance could be likely distorted and the relationship would not hit the rock, but would wax stronger. Although nothing could take the place of physical presence, desperate times call for desperate measures.

 

Oduniyi Dolapo

Distance should not be a barrier for couples who live apart when there is trust and honesty. Communicating regularly on phone would help, but keeping distance on phone could lead to distrust.

Amina Momoh

Relationship could last just as long as the distance is not for a long time. When you see each other often, even if you do not live together, the memories created would keep the relationship alive

 

Okosi Pamela

Yes, if the love is still tender or growing. There is a difference between meeting online and meeting in real life. For you to fall in love, you have to get attached to something one does. You might fall in love with someone because of the way he walks or talks etc. When you do not get to see that frequently and you only get to hear the voice, the love starts fading.

 

Joseph Julius

Distance and relationship are two enemies. Why would you distance yourself from the one you love? It could work for the male folks, but only one per cent for the females. A woman needs a man’s every attention. How could you do that from a distance? For some couples, a brief holiday/vacation ignites love, as your return sparks the love as well. You wake seeing the man/woman you married every day is tiring and research shows that vacation, holiday, outings should be embarked to create a missing vacuum in the relationship.

 

EXPERT SPEAKS

Tosin William is our expert on this issue. She posited that distance should be dreaded. Most times, it is actually a blessing in disguise.  It is a chance that you get to know yourself better. You find a way of living with yourself and enjoying your company. Remember, you are first an individual before a couple. So, distance in a relationship gives you the chance to explore other parts of yourself and discover what truly excite you aside from the prince charming story we read in books. It might be books, writing, or even cooking that you could derive joy from, but you might never find out if your lover is always around. I am not saying love is a distraction, but it could inhibit reasoning process. Distance provokes profitable thoughts. Also, it enhances the value you have for each other. What you see every day cannot mean as much to you as to what you see once in a blue moon. You get to cherish every moment spent together and earnestly looking forward to another moment together. Communication is, however, important to remain on same page. So is trust. It could become difficult when there is distrust and inadequate communication. Though, there should be an agreement on how long the distance would last. This could help to mend broken hearts and restore lost feelings. If you ask ‘ex-couples’ who got back together, you would discover distance did the magic.

 

Next week on WhatsApp Conversation, we would be treating: Would you allow your extended family members interfere in your family crisis?

 

Join our WhatsApp Conversation every Sunday by 8 pm or send in your comments (70 words) to the phone number, email address above or Twitter handle: @WhatsAppConvs

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