Women can be whoever they want to be —Brenda Unuavworho

Brenda Unuavworho, an architect and women’s personal effectiveness strategist who has authored several books and spoken about her passions on various platforms is the convener of the Women’s Growth Academy. In this interview with YEJIDE GBENGA-OGUNDARE, she speaks on her passion for women and mindset development and importance of self upgrade to women among other issues.

HOW will you describe yourself?

I am a woman of many talents. I am energetic and passionate about everything I set my mind to. I bring the vibe to every event and I am a born encourager of the brethren. I am also a much loved daughter of God; I am especially passionate about women’s empowerment and girl-child equality.

What fuels your passion for women development?

I come from a long line of strong women. My mother and her mother go-getters her are energetic, no-nonsense women and go-getters. I grew up hearing stories of how my maternal grandmother picked up the pieces when she was widowed at the young age of 32. She was illiterate but she developed herself and worked hard to raise and train all of her seven children, starting and maintaining several businesses. I also watched my mother work hard to raise five of us, moving from her white collar job in a multinational to entrepreneurship just to make ends meet when the family fell on hard times. She has always been resilient with a firm faith in God. She never complained, she did what she had to do.

This was all I knew till I became an adult and came across women who when faced with bad situations, like the loss of a husband or family income, suddenly fall apart and can’t go on. I saw that the strength of character and skills my mum and her mum possessed were missing in these women. I am especially heartbroken when I see women stay back helpless in abusive situations because they have no skills to fend for themselves, and so do not see leaving as an option.

I therefore made it a life’s mission to equip as many women as possible with the skills they need to thrive no matter the circumstances they find themselves.

What determined the focus of your activities?

What I said earlier answers why I started the Women’s Growth Academy.  But the focus of my activities and teachings stem from lessons I have personally picked along the way, skills I learnt that helped me survive the dark times in my own life. I got the nod from God to package it in this way. And the responses so far have been nothing short of amazing.

What is the importance of self development to women?

It is a given that self development is very important to all humans but even more so to women. As a woman, you dictate the tone of the home. You raise the world’s future. So if you do not self-develop, you are shortchanging your family and the world by your lack of skills.

Self development also very importantly bestows on women the courage to stand up to discrimination and abuse.

Will you say the Nigerian society is fair to women?

I will say that African culture as a whole has done women bad. The Nigerian culture has in the past tried to silence women and class them as those that should be seen and not heard. But those days are gone. Women today are rising up and taking their seats at the table. So as of today, I don’t think I can say the society is being unfair to women. There are actually many opportunities for women now than in the past. I will also say that we can make our own luck. We need to stand up and take our rightful places. But we need to first believe that we are deserving of this and this is part of what WGA addresses.

Many people have some negative ideas about women aspiring for greater heights in positions considered a male domain. Are these views justified?

As a woman who studied and is practising a male-dominated course, architecture, I would say nothing is farther to the truth. God made us male and female and everything we want to do we can, except the things that biology doesn’t permit. I encourage parents of young girls to teach them that they can do whatever they set their minds to. I teach that in my own home by leveling chores and activities. There are no male or female chores and activities. All children do all things. And all children are encouraged to try all things. My sons love to cook, my daughter plays golf.

Do you think there’s a restriction on women in the professional circle in Nigeria?

I do not think so. I think we have come of age in Nigeria; especially southern Nigeria where I reside and women practically can do whatever they set their hearts to. I also believe that many companies have openings for women and are intentionally making the workplace more attractive for young mothers and women. I believe that most of the restrictions women perceive are in their minds. The issue of impostor syndrome is higher among women. This is why the first course in all our teachings is on mindset development.

Can women be good leaders?

Oh yes of course. Women have an important ingredient for good leadership occurring in them naturally – empathy. The world would be a better place if humans had more empathy. I look forward to the first female Nigerian president. And I believe that we would do a much better job at it too.

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