Too stressed for s3x?

Stress affects men and women differently. It is however believed that men and women could behave in the extreme when faced with stressful situations; women actually go into “tend-or-befriend” mode when stressed.

The division of labour in the early days of humankind meant that men often went out to hunt while women stayed at home with the children. When dangerous situations arose, women did not go out to battles but stayed back caring for the young and bonding with other women.

This automatically means that for today’s relationships, when confronted with stress, men tend to want to escape the situation, maybe disappearing into their “man-cave” with their favourite video game or a six-pack.  Many men release stress with some type of physical exertion like exercise or s3xual activity.

Women, on the other hand, might be more interested in bonding and curling up on the couch, wanting to cling close to their family. They might reach out to their friends for a long talk…or simply get lost in the latest episode of their favourite movie. Whatever their comfort of choice, s3x is often the last thing on a woman’s mind after the end of a long day, especially when feeling physically and emotionally drained.

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Though, one cannot generalise with these examples; while men often use s3x as a way to relieve stress, certain types of stress can also make men shut down s3xually. For instance, if a man is worried about his job or his financial situation, he may withdraw from s3x.  Many men define masculinity as an ability to take care of one’s family. If they feel as though they are failing on that front, it often negatively impacts their desire and their ability to perform in the bedroom.

Here are a few things to keep in mind when dealing with stress and s3x:

• Do not wait until the end of the day to have s3x; try finding alternate times to enjoy s3xual pleasure. Instead of waiting until 11 p.m. when you are exhausted and just want to fall into bed, consider early-morning s3x or having s3x in the shower before heading out for work.
• Do not write off s3xual pleasure. This does not mean that you should have s3x when you are not in the mood. But it does mean you should be open to the idea of having s3x and indulge in plenty of kissing and physical affection throughout the day. Even if it does not lead to s3x, affection will keep you bonded and more ready for s3x when the time is right.
• Take care of your health. It is easy to turn to food or alcohol or other substances for comfort when you are stressed, but doing so will only wreak further havoc on your s3xual desire. Instead, utilise healthy stress-management tools. Exercise frequently and eat well, and make your health a priority. S3x can be an important part of a healthy lifestyle. Not only does s3x burn calories and make you feel good, it also can decrease stress.