Regret cannot turn back the clock (I)

THE new year is still very young- it’s a baby in her infancy and at this stage of her development it is easily susceptible to things, situations, events and circumstances that can harm and kill her. Just like a baby must be immunized against certain killer diseases we too must immunize the year else it gets attacked by debilitating factors that can maim and even destroy her. Many things can destroy the new year for us. There are many dangerous and life threatening issues can either be external or internal all geared to killing the new year that is so young and fragile. External threats include the inactions of people, government policies, the economic climate etc. The external issues are usually easily identifiable as they seem to have general applications everybody.

After training, Army deploys special police squad to fight Boko Haram

However it is the internal issues that pose the greatest threat because it is personalized, hidden and it eats us up gradually. These internal issues are silent killers. The internal issues include our fears, attitudes, discouragement, despair, despondency and one of the most potent of them is regret.  We can stifle and kill the new year by not handling regret properly. Regret is a killer disease we must not take for granted.

Regret is revisiting the past and wishing things had been done differently and the inability to change the past produces sorrow, pain, shame and guilt. It makes us think of different things we could have done differently but the problem is that it’s too late to make a change.  It cannot turn back the clock. Regret has no power to change the past.

Regret never wants to accept the fact that what is past is past.  It always wants to keep us wallowing in the past thereby denying us the power of the present to create the future we desire and deserve. We must never allow regret to control us. Regret should not define or limit us. It must be dealt with decisively.

“We don’t have to be defined by the things we did or didn’t do in our past. Some people allow themselves to be controlled by regret. Maybe it’s a regret, maybe it’s not. It’s merely something that happened. Get over it.” Pittacus Lore

This is the beginning of a new year and we must understand it’s a new beginning.

“You have been given a second chance to start your life over. You can’t throw this opportunity away. If you do you will be a colossal fool. If you get the chance to do something and don’t do it then you’ll simply live with regret. That’s a worse situation than trying something daring and maybe not succeeding. At least you tried. Isn’t that what you want to show your kids?” Lorena Bathey,

Regret evokes questions that most times do not solve but aggravate the problem. Regret makes us ask the wrong questions like –“ how come?; why me? ; why now?; what came over me? ; why was I so stupid?” etc.

Regret can never turn back the clock so there is no point wasting valuable time in regret. We must learn to deal with regret.

“Not everything’s perfect, especially in the beginning. And its all right to have a little bit of regret every once in a while. It’s when you feel it all the time and can’t do anything about it… that’s when you get into trouble”  Sarah Dessen.

TO BE CONTINUED

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