Lest we forget Redeemers’ renegade

THREE things in my life are irrevocably settled, irrespective how long I live. One is, who do I want to forever be; a bonafide child of God. Two, my greatest achievement in life; knowing Christ. Three, my greatest ambition; to make heaven at all cost and take countless souls with me. Even when likely forged in ignorance, deep conviction is required to be an adherent of anything, including Satanism. Without passionate buy-in, regulatory codes will merely produce the famed Warri students who were asked to crouch on their knees for breaking school rules, who though complied, later boasted that “though we kneel down for eyes (outwardly), for our minds, na gidigba we dey stand.”

Personal experiences suggest to me such internal rebellion is prevalent in many regulated institutions wherein students should ordinarily be considered mature enough for “freedom”. The burgeoning “conflict” today in Nigerian faith-based universities, intent on rigid enforcement of code of conducts for students, is primarily traceable to this “gidigba” posture.

With the minimal facts at my disposal, things could be worse than assumed in such institutions. A younger friend recently told me about “special indomie (noodles) in a faith-based university (identity withheld). It is cooked with igbo (marijuana) then garnished with another cocktail of hard substance. After meal, the diners then settle for “white substance” for dessert. My friend witnessed but didn’t participate, according to him. I had a hard time believing that aspect of his story.

When 21-year-old Tolani Ajayi, hacked his father Charles Ajayi (SAN) to death in 2014, the 300-level student of History and International Relations, of Redeemers’ University, confessed to acting under “substance.” He was likely a special indomie diner.

Tolani’s colleague, Debo Adedayo, whose brilliant deployment of euphemism got him expelled, would appear deserving of the authorities’ sanction, but would that bring out the man the authorities wanted him to be in the last four years? Even if he returned a jelly as demanded for reprieve, would he truly be a reformed mind?

That Debo was capable of such social media post should be a corporate and spiritual worry for those who mentored him for four years, instead of idiosyncratic focus being given it. There are still countless Debos in such academic environments, totally not touched by both morning and evening devotions and weeks of spiritual emphasis. More are a shade blackened, like Tolani. The renegades should be a wake-up call to the relevant authorities, not using them to dust administrative shelves.

Pancaked peace

Watching public-villain Aso Rock Chief of Staff Abba Kyari doing a one-arm ostensible fight-over cuddle with gadfly Head of Service Winifred Oyo-Ita at the last Wednesday FEC meeting, to the expanded grin of other attendees, reminds me of Baba Iyabo’s open-and-close tight blues dance with Mama Peace at a birthday gig in the East, after doing her husband re-election in. Except Ebora Owu is purged of unforgiving demons, he would likely give Jonathan “stud” again if a re-run presidential election came up the succeeding weekend of the illegal “tight” dance. Cuddling should be a demonstration of affection, but the dictionary of politicians, is of, and from a planet where only their ilk, exist and survive. In tackling “enemies within, Obj and Buhari’s administration, would appear to be of more lethal strategies than GEJ. While the latter went after stay-in piss-in like his once-CBN governor, Sanusi Lamido without much niceties, Obj in his time as president, would even eat pounded yam in his enemy’s home, before pulling a pistol to extract under-duress resignation.

Buhari’s style is just unfolding. For a man always talking war and speaking peace war-like, his peace offerings to stay-inside, piss-inside, in his administration should trouble the beneficiaries, especially this Oyo-Ita woman who has surpassed even the Yola bomber, Aisha Buhari, in publicly rubbing the nose of the administration in jar of salt. Only a second term gambit would make Aisha Alhassan, other-room Aisha, Ibe Kachikwu and lately Oyo-Ita still comfortably sharing the confines and corridors of power with a choleric personality like the president. That is why they should be watchful of their conducts. If any, particularly the HoS, should give a chance for Ibrahim Magu or Lawan Daura to summon them, they will know the difference between khaki and leather. Instead of ensconcing in her gap-toothed revelry for too long, it would be in Oyo-Ita’s interest to try a snap forensic psychoanalysis of that Kyari’s grin and the texture of the touch on her by a supposed Shariarist. The visage of the aloof peacemaker Gen. Babagana Monguno, on this day of “peace-making” should worry Madam tell-all. But isn’t there something in even her latest public raucous laughter and unbridled anger of the other day, that draws similitude between her surname Oyo-Ita and Omo-Ita (Yoruba’s neology for a street-wise)?

Fayose deserves grazing bow

Ekiti State Governor Ayo Fayose got a rare applause last Monday. A senior public servant in Abuja from Ekiti (names withheld) who places more value on his flu-induced phlegm than the governor, couldn’t help but praising his better-disappeared kith for belling the anti-grazing law cat. He surprised himself for seeing “at least one good thing the oniyeye (not serious fellow) has done”. While the deep calleth to the deep, let the unconventional tackle the unconventional. My Fayose-hater friend couldn’t imagine what the country would look like if the Ekiti maverick had not done the Trump threat-style of poisoning the water and barbecuing straying cows. Both herd and men borrowed the Jamaican bolting codes before Irunmole himself would turn on them. The much-blasted Ekiti antidote to the epical murderous grazing, is now a national model; well, maybe, without the otapiapia formula. Oshoko please, take the warrior’s arrow and a bow.