Is he sincere with me?

Dear Yemisi,

I  am dating a guy who stays far away from where I stay. He stays in Lagos while I am based in Ibadan.

He calls me when he feels like doing so, I am the only one calling most of the time.

Whenever I asked him why he did not call, he always tells me that he does not have money to buy recharge cards and that he is just managing on campus.

I am getting tired of him. Don’t you think this guy is deceiving me?

What should I do?

Anonymous, 08•••••••••

Dear Anonymous,

To my understanding, the distance from between Lagos and Ibadan is not far. What if either of you is staying in Sokoto?

Should out of sight be out of mind? From what you have stated, I doubt if the guy is serious with you. For how long have you been dating? You equally added that he is an undergraduate, you should believe him if he tells you that he has no money to buy recharge card hence his inability to always do the calling.

What do you do for a living? It is possible that you have the means of calling him all the time. You should not pick hole from his submission because you have to show more understanding as long as he remains a student.

You will be making a very grave mistake if you have the notion that not calling you is synonymous with insincerity. There is no law that says he should be the only one to call you. As long as you are mature enough to handle a relationship, you should be prepared to make some sacrifices for the sustenance of the relationship.

Nothing from your submission suggests deceit unless you have investigated his activities on campus that suggest otherwise. I will advise you to learn to trust whoever you are dating. Trust is an essential component of any human relationship. If you find it difficult to trust each other at this early stage of your dating, you might be sending a wrong signal to whoever chooses to date you.

You have to make your feelings known to him about his attitude. There is no crime in opening up to each other.

The ball is in your court, and if you are not convinced of his reason for not calling you as you expect, you better review your position before it is too late.