Gibbers

Our Zee World

Had I known, I wouldn’t have ventured near their viewing interest, trying to steer their love away from the cultural pressure love usually encounters in India and being projected to the rest of the world, through Zee World. Yeah, I am talking about my wife and daughters. My tele-crusading to them succeeded in reverse. Instead of getting them converted to other viewing interests I assumed fitting, I was the one who got entangled in their phantasia.

The era of Dharam Singh Deol, popularly known as Dharmendra, HemaMalini, Amitabh Bachchan, and the ja li lihinhinhin, ja li lilah ah ahah musical infusions, wherein dogs were made to shed “real” tears for beloved owner-hero, lost to just cause of social crusading and justice for the oppressed, still rocks for me, despite its perceived archaic-ness, complete, with its usual visual interpretative dialogue. Maybe I’m not dynamic enough to accept the Western copycat India is now throwing at us, through Zee World, trying to interpret cultural beholdens, using other people’s lens and prism. Even now, they lip-sync in English, instead of retaining the original Hindi dialogues, maybe for wider audiences. Well, culture and language are supposed to be Siamese twins and any foreign infusion renders originality inchoate.

When we kept vigils to watch famed actor-heroes, delectable damsels, cigar-chewing villains, those horses and dogs that aped men and even the love songs and belly-dances, they spoke Hindi and had the dialogues translated in English on the screen. That was real and original. Before you throw a tu quo que, I don’t essentially see our actors (English-speaking), as culture icons. I see business men and women, and fame seekers who want to “blow”. Maybe, pidgin would be closer home for them, instead of I wanna, ganna.

So, the women in my life got me and now, I occasionally watch Young Dreams et al. A dominant trait of Zee World’s presentations is what I sum as trial of love. It is either a wicked mother-in-law or an agony aunt and since, extended family members are culturally designed to live together, it is always easy for their script writers, to build conflict plots and take eternity to resolve them, introducing twists and turns, to keep viewers glued. Are they succeeding, check my home?

An average Zee World sour romance story will perfectly fit the story of Nigeria, 107 years, down the lane. Just like in Nigeria (every part has caught the bug), marital vows and associated ‘feferity’, are always elaborate in Zee World India. There are always priests and dotted lines to be signed on the faces of the bejewelled couple, roles which British journalist Flora Louise and her husband, Frederick Lord Lugard, perfectly played at the wedding of Northern and Southern Protectorates, to form Niger-area.

From available facts, Lugard and Lady Shaw who superintended the “holy” wedlock, prepared the North as the husband-to-be and for a people with cultural domination of the weaker gender, they went full throttle in their role as the alpha male of the household. By 1960, the writ was signed and delivered for North, to rule over the South. Why it would take successive military rule in the 80s through 90s for the wifey to know that rights aren’t equal in matrimony anywhere, is baffling. And when Southerners now complain of domination by North, the simple question should be, why staying in the marriage for this long, knowing fully well that rights won’t be equal. Let’s accept the argument that at the point of contracting the union in 1914, wifey had no say, which isn’t a big deal, because it used to be a way of life down South, why indulge the husband for this long, knowing it had no capacity to love anyone except itself.

In Twist of Fate, featuring Abhi the rough Rock Star and the sweetened-Pragya, (my people’s favourite because it is the most emotional running love story. You ask how I know. Do they allow one to rest and you must give a listening ear), despite the deep affection between both, the immaturity of the alpha male, forced a separation, running into Season 3.

God doesn’t want divorce, and separation isn’t divorce. The love birds aren’t together, but raising kids together. Their forced absence now races their blood, anytime they see or hear anything, reminding of the other person. There are moments in life when value soars and appreciation is restored, only when physical separation occurs, not necessarily out of conflict. You don’t value a lot of seeming common-places, until they become far-flung. Even a baby doll, belonging to your partner, could easily cause emotional meltdown when time and space, force separation. I’m not a dog lover but I have seen those mammals trying to welcome beloved owners not seeing for days.

I’m also not a North/South-person. I am a humanity-person. But right now, the marriage between up-North and down-South, isn’t working, but hasn’t broken down irretrievably. When a husband decided to starve his wife, to instill commonsense and respect, it is certain the woman would seek vengeance even when the blockade is lifted and owoobe (maintenance) handout is restored. If a woman is as defiant as the South is now, that home is in danger of being razed. Add that to a shamed husband, who had to resume “duty” because he met a brick-wall where he thought a salacious welcome awaited him. Ego-driven husbands don’t like to carry last as the street lingo would capture the heavy defeat North just inflicted on itself, trying to play okoiyawo (husband in charge). Like Warri people, such disgraced husbands, would laslas, seek a draw. When defiance and revenge converge on a home, only the Prince of Peace, can avert a bloodshed.

Even now, the wife has just discovered that the husband isn’t only vulnerable, those things that appear as its fortress, are actually bulldozeable. Since women are generally wired to be inquisitive, trust the South, to try poke North’s eyeball in days ahead and the husband will also want to prove like General KollingtonAyinla reminded his estranged wife, SalawaAbeni, when their romance soured, that the arsenal of fortification had not gone with the fire, stoked by the North under its own roof. Before this “home” would require pa’na-pa’na (fire fighters), can we just “space” the couple for a while?

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