Intimacy

Oral sex: Not without consequences

In the spirit of consequences therapy which was discussed sometime ago on this platform, I will like to give consideration to the consequences of oral sex in this write up.

For avoidance of doubt, oral sex means using your mouth, lips or tongue to stimulate your partner’s genitals or anus. Both men and women can give their partner oral sex. Oral sex is also variously called such names as – ‘going down’, a ‘blow job’, ‘giving head’, a ‘69’ or ‘rimming’ (and a lot more). Medically, oral sex has names too: oral sex on a woman (the vagina, vulva and clitoris) is called cunnilingus, while on a man (the penis), it is called fellatio. If oral sex involves the anus, it’s called anilingus.

Many people are talking and discussing about oral sex. It is also causing uproars among married couples. While some spouses find it convenient, others consider it disgusting. While some others want to know if it is worth experimenting with it, others are simply saying it is a no go area for them. I heard a wife saying that her husband was demanding for a strange kind of sex, which I suspect is oral sex. A husband is also feeling guilty about having to continue with oral sex with his wife. According to him, his conscience has given him no peace about it, after introducing his wife to it. Now, the wife doesn’t want to hear anything about sex, if it is not oral.

The two camps are also not sparing efforts at winning the arguments for and against. One interesting thing about the camps is that they are not gender based. That is, both genders are in the two camps. As we have wives routing for it, so also do we have wives strongly opposed to it. This is also the pattern with the husbands. There are ‘nayers’ and ‘sayers’ among them too. That is where we have problems when a couple has a ‘sayer’ and a ‘nayer’@. It becomes yam pepper, scatter, scatter.

The grounds for and against also cut across religion. While some Christians and Muslims have clocked in for oral sex, others in both religions are vehemently opposed to it, considering it as a sacrilege.

Another ground for consideration is the medical consequences. While many are quick to point to the fact that upsurge in cases of cancer of the throat and cervix in recent years are traceable to oral sex being on the increase, others are quick to dismiss such conclusion as not being scientifically proven beyond reasonable doubt.

Emerging facts about oral sex

* It is pleasurable for people to be routing for it. People will not stick to anything that is not pleasure based. There is obviously something pleasurable in it for people to be ready to part ways with their spouses, if they are denied the opportunity of such an experience. So, that oral sex is pleasurable is not deniable

* There are undeniable medical risks associated with oral sex. The argument that the risk of contacting cancer of the throat and cervix is not scientifically proven beyond reasonable doubt is not enough ground to dismiss the associated risks. The truth is that there are medical evidences for credence to the risk of cancer through oral sex. Many medical practitioners have come up with positions, through professional practices, linking oral sex with certain medical concerns, of which cancer is one. These concerns are globally available through the internet.

* Oral sex is a source of marital disharmony. When a couple consists of a nayer and a sayer, the marriage becomes endangered. This is already playing out among many couples today, and it is tearing marriages apart. While some couples are on cold war, not wanting to fight dirty, for religious reasons, others are on serious war paths. In fact, in some instances, one will think it is the camps of President Trump and ex-President Biden that are at war. What a precarious situation for such marriages. So, we cannot deny the fact of oral sex fanning the fire of disharmony in marriage.

ORAL SEX: NOT WITHOUT CONSEQUENCES.

I think we are here because of advertures. Man naturally is adventurous. Many inventions we have today came out of the search of man for a better life. With such inventions also came certain negative consequences. Man, in fun seeking, must have strayed into the foray of oral sex. It is not the normal pattern of sexual satisfaction and procreation. Or is there any link between oral sex and procreation? Couples, majorly still have to end up with the normal routine of sex for conception to take place. Or has any woman gotten pregnant through the month?

God or nature (for the sake of those who have problem with the God factor in creation) did not erroneously position the sex organs i.e. underneath. Why turning upside down to seek pleasure from the sex organs? But curiosity led us to where we are today, for which grave consequences are steering us in the face. If care is not taking, that curiosity will trap us like the monkey that is curiously trapped with banana.

Consequences Therapy solution for oral sex

Oral sex requires that you look before you leap in the following manner

*Don’t start a fire you cannot quench. If you didn’t start your marriage with oral sex, in the commonly understood term, don’t let curiosity lead you there. You may never imagine how far it will drag you on that road

* Count the cost to your marriage, in case you have an unwilling spouse, who has to be coarsed, or violated for it. You may destroy a happy marriage, and by extension, a happy family, in the end

* Think of the medical consequences in case it is true. Can you afford such a cancerous price for sexual satisfaction?

Conclusively, it is proverbially stated that you don’t force a person not to contact leprousy as long as he is willing and ready to live in isolation the rest of his sojourn on Earth. Such isolation is not like that of covid 19.The choice for oral sex is that of individuals or a couple. It’s a free world. So, have fun, but with the full assurance that consequences will call you to give an account.

YOU CAN AVAIL YOURSELF OF COPIES OF MY BOOKS: “HOW TO HELP YOUR WIFE ENJOY SEX”, AND “ENJOYING GREAT SEX LIFE.” CONTACT 08112658560 FOR DETAILS.

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