As humans, we face different problems and distractions which affect our mental and psychological well-being — from the daily struggles for survival, to the stress in relationships, family issues, business, among others, and these make us believe that a peaceful, joyful existence is impossible.
However, Isiaka Oyebamiji, in his book, Guide to Peaceful Living: A Regular Self-Appraisal Exercise, uses experiences and lessons from his personal life battles rising from a poor, obscure and disadvantaged background, surviving a bruising, disruptive marital crisis and more to establishing himself as a successful entrepreneur after three fulfilling careers as a teacher, chartered accountant and banker, to prove that one can definitely live happily and in peace in spite of vicissitudes.
The 10-chapter book opens with, ‘When life happens,’ in which the author paints how awry and against expectaions life can sometimes be, but points out that the choice to make life either easy or difficult for oneself lies in the hands of the individual.
The opening chapter not only presages but also encapsulates the entire content of the book, which is then broadened and elaborated on and applied to various aspects of human life in subsequent chapters.
The recurring theme and message of the author is that one can live a life devoid of stress, and anxiety if one cares to learn and understand oneself and the environment. He assures the reader of victory, peace of mind, happiness, contentment fulfillment and success if one can apply this awareness, which he describes as “the knowledge of nature and nurture” to respond and adjust to situations and even challenges as they arise.
The endeavour, according to Oyebamiji, will reveal to the one who is earnest his strengths and weaknesses which he can leverage to turn situations to his advantage.
He cites various instances of how the principles he shared in the book helped him overcome and even profit from otherwise agonizing and distressful circumstances that would have broken him as a child, a struggling youth, as well as in his career, family and business, as he journeyed through. From an unfulfilled dream of becoming an aeronautic engineer in the United States, to finding himself as a classroom teacher through sheer grit, tenacity, fighting spirit and ability to recognise and maximise opportunities, he rose to become a chartered accountant, banker and later proprietor of a reputable school.
The “unfulfilled dreams and missed opportunities did not dampen his spirit, nor cause him sadness, hopelessness, mental breakdowns or make him suicide-prone, as many today regrettably allow themselves to fall victims; rather, they galvanised him to surmount the odds which he always faced with equanimity, prayers and fervent belief in the almighty God to achieve positive result.
Oyebamiji gives further tips and hints on self-development, how to avoid disappointments, worry, anxiety and how to achieve radiant health and be at peace and in harmony with not just oneself, but other people.
In Chapter eight entitled ‘Your spirituality: Connect with the power within’, he emphasises the importance of the God factor in one’s endeavours, while the ninth chapter, ‘Build on your strength, work on the weaknesses,’ also reinforces from the earlier admonition for one to know oneself inside out. With this, one will be able to build and develop areas where one has strengths and also work on areas where one has challenges.
Peaceful living, says the author, “ is not life without crisis, but life despite crisis.” Coming at a time like this when many are confused, weighed down and perplexed on what to do to cope with challenges in different areas of their lives, this work offers more than a clue. The reader will find it an invaluable companion and compass to successfully navigate through life.
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