Resilience: The grit to persevere until you succeed

Ahmed and Balarabe were classmates and friends since year one of studying Engineering at Ahmadu Bello University. They were both very brilliant and aced their courses. Ahmed always had higher scores and eventually made a first class, while Balarabe graduated with a second class upper. Ahmed got a job with a top oil and gas firm and was well remunerated while Balarabe had to start teaching in a secondary school, running an extra-mural school for secondary school students, and engaging in some trading for a few years before he landed a good job in the Telecommunications industry.

Fast forward 15 years later and Balarabe was an industry leader and holding a top management position while Ahmed had risen to mid-level management and then plateaued there. In terms of academic brilliance and talent, Ahmed was obviously head and shoulders above Balarabe. However, in terms of the inner passion and grit to overcome the odds and not give up, Balarabe was the more determined and focused of the pair. Ahmed tends to take things easy and give up if things were not going his way or obstacles reared their head during any endeavour.

What attributes do we need to be really successful, flourish, and be emotionally on solid ground no matter the odds? Would it be brilliance? Talent? Exceptionally high IQ? Hardwork? Passion? Perseverance?

“Talent isn’t enough. Success demands a fierce inner fire and a drive to persist against all obstacles,” a Psychology professor at the University of Pennsylvania once said.

The attribute most critical to success, as demonstrated by years of psychological research is grit or resilience, which is often explained as a combination of passion and perseverance. This refers to an uncommon determination and a willingness to stick to a task despite challenges; to envisage success at the end of the day and work towards it; to not be easily discouraged and defeated by setbacks along the way.

How do successful people manage to be resilient?

First, resilience or grit can be trained and acquired. Indeed, most military drills and training aim to instill the willpower to persist with a task, despite experiencing pain, adverse weather, discomfort, and so on. This is not only true for the military but also true for other spheres of life. Highly successful athletes know that winning is not just about talent or physical fitness levels. Of course, these are also very important. But beyond the hard work, the ultimate difference between ‘also-rans’ and the champions is a difference in mentality – the resilience and grit to give it all it takes. A steely determination to fight with all that they have until the very end, and simply not fold and give up.

Second, the realisation that resilience or grit is a combination of two critical factors: passion and perseverance. Passion is the joy and happiness that you derive from a cause, a sport, or an end objective that motivates you to go the extra mile to achieve the stated objective. Passion is what makes you stay up at night, training and planning to achieve a goal that is close to your heart. And in return, when you achieve the goal, the sense of fulfillment and contentment is always a huge reward in itself. Thus, we can surmise that dreams and ambition drive passion. Their passion ultimately gives them a sense of purpose and direction (focus).

Perseverance on the other hand is arguably the strongest attribute that one can develop. Many high-achieving individuals fall short of great success and ground-breaking work because they excel when things are going smoothly but simply fall apart when things are rough, and they encounter challenges. Yet we can’t live all our lives without encountering challenges and difficulties from time to time.

Ahmed and Balarabe were talented and brilliant and were both successful in their own rights. However, the difference between who really rose to the top and who was content to simply be mid-level management was their grit and resilience. While Balarabe was adventurous and willing to stick to a task until he succeeds, giving it all it requires; Ahmed was more interested in doing things that were safe and routine and would give up and change tack once things were not going well for his team or for any task he had to accomplish. Thus, Balarabe naturally emerged as an effective leader, while Ahmed was quite content to be a team player and follower.

Conclusion

Beyond potential, talent, or brilliance, the intangible secret weapon of most successful people in any sphere of human endeavour is their grit or resilience. Thankfully, psychology teaches us that it can be acquired, via developing our emotional muscles. Some people acquire it through early adversity in the natural course of their lives, through training and discipline (military, elite athletes etc) while others acquire it intentionally as part of their personal growth and development.

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