Did I wrong him by telling him my past?

Dear Yemisi,

I am a 27-year-old lady. I graduated some three years ago from the university. I have since completed the one year mandatory service.

As an undergraduate, I ensured I never had any serious attachment to any man as I was made to believe that having a boyfriend as a young girl was tantamount to getting pregnant even with just a touch by the opposite sex.

I now realised at the service that took me to the Northern part of the country that I needed a man in my life having waited that long. I would say that I was so lucky to have met with a young promising oil and gas expert who incidentally is equally from the South West.

We both started dating and promised each other a blissful future together. As I came back home, I informed my parents of my date who was so anxious in meeting with his future in-laws. My parents were equally happy in meeting with him.

Consequently, a date was agreed on by my parents for him to meet with them. It was a great event as everything went well. It was on this very day that the date of our wedding was announced as my alleged lover was told to arrange a meeting with them with his parents for an informal get-together.

The two families having agreed to a date went our ways in making preparations for the day. The traditional wedding was to hold the same day but early before the church service. But alas, the day never came to be as my fiancée and his people refused to turn up for the event till date.

This embarrassment nearly cost my parents’ heart attack as they are just coming out of the trauma. I took it in my stride that we were not destined to be joined in holy matrimony after series of counselling by my pastor and other elderly people.

The guy in question even changed his SIM card that made communicating with him a big challenge only for me to be told that he travelled out of the country on the day we were expected to sign the dotted lines. After waiting for some months expecting that he would call to explain what went wrong endlessly, I decided to pick my pieces together to start a new life as life continues.

I had to change my location as I moved to Lagos to start on a clean slate. I attend a living church and I ensured that I work for God hoping to meet with a born again brother who will love me the way I had hoped. Lo and behold a brother eventually proposed to me after he had told me that he was convinced that I am God’s will for his life.

With this word of assurance, I gave him my word that I too needed to seek the face of God concerning his proposal. In no time, the confirmation came and I gave him my word.

As a child of God, I felt I needed not hide my past experience from him as I told him all that happened to my first date. I could read how sorry he was for my past nasty experience promising heaven and earth that such a story will not repeat itself.

At a point when I felt I was in safe hand, the least expected happened. This second guy again ran away without a parting word. I am puzzled. I am feeling like committing suicide!

Did I commit a sin by telling him my first experience? I have asked several questions with no plausible answer to calm my frayed nerves.

Dear Yemisi, I think your counsel and those of your readers’ will put my mind at rest and give me hope of a better tomorrow. I am counting on you urgently because I don’t want to die in silence.

Gift.

Dear Readers, this is to wish you the very best in 2018. I appreciate you for your contributions over the years. I am calling again for your apt intervention on Gift’s letter asking for your counsel as she is contemplating suicide as a way out of what has befallen her in her last two dates. Kindly send your reactions to yemiaofolaju@yahoo.com or 08055001741.