My premature ejaculation!

Dear Yemisi,
I ejaculate too early (premature ejaculation) and this has started from the very first day I had s*x in my life.

Mola, 0******18**.

Dear Mola,

This terse letter of yours clearly describes that you are experiencing premature ejaculation. According to experts your predicament could either be traced to physical or psychological causes which can be cured through behavioural techniques or medication.

Your predicament is always a source for concern as it causes you to be embarrassed in the presence of your partner. I want you to know that you are not alone in this as it has been discovered that about 30 percent of men experience this at a point in their lives.

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The physical cause might have been due to medical conditions that have to do with nervous system and urinary and reproductive area of the body. It is said that a man’s ability to control his ejaculatory reflex can also be affected by alcohol, drugs and medication as well as low testosterone or an over-sensitive penis. So if you are on drugs or an alcoholic, what you are experiencing might have emanated from either of these two or both.

The other cause which has to do with psychology is said to stem from limited s*xual experience, infrequent s*x or a rushed masturbation style that you might have been indulged in. It is also likely to have been the result of your fears about losing erection, anxiety over ejaculating too quickly, problematic relationship or that your partner is s*xually inadequate.

You should be able to trace the cause of your inadequacy from the above. Once the cause is identified, then the remedy is at hand.

As long as I will not be committing unpardonable offence by recommending any treatment for you, I will implore you to get to see your doctor/s*x therapist in an established hospital or clinic while you work on your behavioural techniques.

In trying to find a way round your condition, several suggestions were recommended. The suggestions range from strengthening the pelvic floor muscles through exercises so as to gain more control over premature ejaculation. Such exercises include pelvic floor exercises, stop-start technique, squeeze technique, use of specialised condoms, practising meditation, reducing intensity among others as will be prescribed by experts.

All that suggestions listed above can only be meaningful to you only when you consult with a urologist for expert advice who will explain the nitty- gritty of all so as to get over your fears.

Above all, you must have it in mind that you have to help yourself by ensuring that you work seriously on the state of your mind at every point in time because it has been observed that premature ejaculation lies in the mind of its victim either as a mental block or simply fears about his anticipated performance in bed.