Intimacy

How to draw water from the well of a frigid wife (2)

AS earlier stated, what a supposed frigid wife needs is for her husband to draw her out of her cocoon, and she will be turned into a sexually responsive wife. All those log of wood, touch me not, get it done quickly responses will be a thing of the past in your marriage. To achieve this, the following things will be like the magic wand to wave over her head.

  • Talk love into her

The greatest sex organ in humans is the mind, especially women, being more emotionally driven than men. I read in one of the books of a man of God of blessed memory that throughout his married life spanning over fifty years, his  first and last daily act with his wife was to tell her” I love you” with a passionate kiss. No wonder he never experienced anything called frigidity from his wife. They enjoyed a great sex life. You can not make your waking and sleeping moments end with the phrase”I love you”with a kiss, and experience any frigid moment with your wife. Doing so is to deposit yourself in the heart of your wife. And since her mind is her greatest sex organ, you can be rest assured that you will always be handsomely rewarded with great sex. A woman responds sexually with ease and fervent passion to any man who regularly deposits himself on her mind.

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  • Put her first in everything

Some men are very selfish in many areas including sex. If you want to “cure” your wife of frigidity, let her come first in your life: in eating ,let her have the choice portion of the meal. In spending, let her needs come before your own. When it comes to sex, find out what she wants, and not what you want: what will satisfy her. Focus on meeting her need, rather than using her to meet your own need. Most men are just using their wives to meet their own sexual need. That  is why they just jump on her, and start pumping her up, without caring about her own pleasure. When you focus on meeting her needs, she will want to reciprocate, and then it becomes a game of both of you trying to outdo one another. Such a wife cannot be frigid with you.

  • Be a friend to your wife

Some couples are just like cat and dog: they don’t relate well. You need to relate well with your wife: chat her up about her day, the happenings in the office or neighborhood, society and the world at large. Share jokes and listen to her also when she is talking, rather than you doing all the talking. Watch the television or go to cinema together. Do what friends enjoy doing  together.When you befriend her like this, one thing will lead to another, and you will end up naturally having sex, though your focus is not sex but friendship. You are the one to take the lead in this like in all areas. A wife looks up to her husband for leadership. So, don’t excuse yourself by saying she doesn’t care or do it. Take the lead, and she will follow you.

  • Be affectionate with your wife

Affection in a marriage should never be compromised. You have to be kind heartedly loving with your spouse. Don’t let courtship end your affectionate acts towards each other. Hold her hands deliberately till it becomes a habit in your marriage. If the society does not encourage it, do it when you are together alone, or in the company of people with the right understanding. Call yourself affectionate names, and let it sound affectionately real, and not something mechanical. Help each other out in the home: spend time with her in the kitchen occasionally, and take care of some house chores for her on purpose at times. Buy her gifts as often as you can afford it. But, whatever the situation is, don’t allow a year pass by without you marking the gift register in your marriage. Let me add that in doing this, don’t give her money for the gift,  but buy it yourself. Just do certain things to impress her just like when you were courting her. When you live like this, nothing frigid can come up in your sex life. Anything to the contrary will be strange. I hope to deal with some strange, weird sex behaviour in marriage soon to balance things on the issue of frigidity.

All these will help you to reach her and draw water from her well.

My book, Enjoying Great Sex Life, is still on sale. Call 08112658560 for details.

 

 

David Olagunju

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