Culture shock: Some memorable encounters in Kuwait

CULTURE shock arises from the natural refutation between our traditional patterns of behavior and the psychological dispute of attempting to maintain them in a new environment. Allow me to bore you a little bit with my own experience during my trip out of the shores of my forefathers on a visit to Kuwait. It is a story full of different forms of culture shocks. Everything seemed so interesting on my arrival to the beautiful country where there are no power outages and where late nights out are almost like day time back home! My first week was a honeymoon. Then one afternoon I decided to visit my father’s office in one of the top learning institutions; it was such a serene environment for teaching and learning process. I decided to take a walk around the new environment and probably make new friends since I was in the school environment.

The first thing that struck was the apparent seclusion between the sexes; guys and girls forming exclusive groups and having fun. I began to wonder what was going on unlike the situation back in my University days where both guys and ladies mingled freely around the school environment and catch fun around the school together. I decided moving closer to a group of guys who were discussing and obviously having fun, I tried putting up a smile on my face like they were also doing because I couldn’t understand them speaking Arabic language. Fortunately, I heard one of them speaking English, so I said Hello to him and he replied warmly and we engaged in a more meaningful conversation. I asked why the ladies were talking to each other and the guys too were doing the same, he smiled and replied: “The norm here is that guys don’t mingle with ladies.” Then, I understood better. I decided moving towards the cafeteria where I had my seat closer to a group of ladies sitting also and having coffee, I tried saying hello with a smile and they also replied with similar smiling faces. This gave me the confidence of moving closer and getting to know them better since it feels more relaxing interacting with the opposite sex. We exchanged pleasantries and they told me their names and asked for mine too. I felt fulfilled and went back to my father’s office because it was almost time to go home.

Surprisingly the following day, I was almost denied entrance into the building if not for my father’s respected status by the security men, it was then I realized I have violated the rules of sitting closer to ladies and trying to have a conversation with them. This came as a big shock because I never expected it could be taken up to this extent; hence I decided not to walk close beside a lady not to talk of sitting next to them. Followed by that was my experience  the first time I decided to take a bus to my uncle’s office, I boarded  with few other ladies at the terminal and sat comfortably at the front row while two of the ladies were standing by my side because the whole seats were occupied.Few minutes later, I noticed all eyes were on me and I was wondering what could be the reason, until a man stood up from the back seat and one of the ladies went to sit there. When I noticed this scenario, it dawned on me that I was expected to have done the same thing, so I stood up immediately to allow the other lady have a seat. Now I knew the reason why everybody was staring at me. I could also remember the first bus I was meant to board didn’t wait for me. My belief was that the driver ignored me because I was not fast enough to enter, but my father later told me it was because the driver thought I was a student (secondary level) and I wouldn’t add any value to the bus since students don’t pay transport fare. I smiled. It was completely a strange incidence I never expected!

Furthermore, there is a sense of uniformity in the mode of dressing, eating and communication of the Kuwaitis which isdissimilar to the diverse nature of different ethnic groups in Nigeriawhereby each of them are different in mode of dressing, eating and communication. For example, dishdasha (jellabiya) and abbaya are uniform attires for male and female Kuwaitis respectively.This is a clear difference from the way diverse tribes in Nigeria have various mode of dressing. It also took me weeks before I could start eating some kind of foods in Kuwait, since they were totally different from the type of food with which I familiar. Meeting with new people has been so interesting but the language fatigue began to set in, which made me became physically and psychologically exhausted while trying to speak, listen and comprehend what they were saying. This made me develop an interest to learn how to speak Arabic so I would be able to communicate effectively. To achieve this, a language tutor and some new friends I just made in Kuwait did a wonderful job, so I improved a great deal in the language.

Deciding to adjust to the new environment wasn’t an easy task. For instance, I got to know that kissing someone’s forehead is the highest respect you can accord an elderly person and kissing the cheeks is the best way of greeting a dear friend either male or female, unlike Nigeria where you have to prostrate till your chest touches the ground to greet an elderly person. I remember the day my father took me to one of his colleagues at work. She was delighted to see me, she asked my father if I didn’tlike talking to people because I was wearing dark sunglasses and doing that in front of an elderly person in her own (Syrian) culture is a sign of disrespect and unwillingness to talk to the older ones. I was amazed and immediately took it off. I was also told crossing legs over each other while sitting in front Arabs (especially Egyptians) is a sign of arrogance.

There was also a noticeable difference in how different sectors operate in Kuwait. For instance, during my first visit to the clinic, I noticed that there was no queue, everybody was calm either sitting or standing. There were different sections for different types of ailments, including the chronic ones,so all you need to do is go to the section you belong and get yourself a waiting ticket then you are automatically on the queue.When it’s your turn you would see a notification of your ticket number at the entrance to the doctor’s office. After seeing a doctor and there is a need to run a test or take drugs from the pharmacy, the same waiting order is observed. I got to understand that medical services are free, including tests and drugs, but some drugs are given to citizens of the country only. This means expatriates are given other types that are also effective but less expensive. In case such expensive drugs are prescribed for expatriates, they must buy it from private pharmaceutical shops outside.

The education sector and employment opportunities are totally different too, because citizens of the country have access to free education from elementary to tertiary levels.The students also receive monthly stipends from the government unlike in Nigeria where citizens have to pay for education from elementary to tertiary levels, while getting a scholarship is survival of the fittest. Likewise after the completion of their education, all they need to do to gain employment is for them to register at the Public Authority for Manpower (PAM) and they are going to be notified as soon as a suitable job is available for them either in the public or private sector. This is unlike the case of Nigeria where graduates have to search for jobs from one organization to another until mother lucksmiles at them. Considering most of those aforementioned points, I could confidently be said to have gone through different stages of culture shock such as the honeymoon, frustration, adjustment and acceptance stages. Even at that, common symptoms such as extreme loneliness, sleep and eating disturbance,disorientation, hypochondria, and loss of focus and ability to complete task persisted.

• Badru recently returned home from Kuwait