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10 ‘green flags’ to spot in the people around you

We often focus so much on the red flags in people around us, which makes us “cancel” them from our lives; that we forget that the green flags exist too.   

What are “green flags”? These are things in your relationship that indicate that your relationship is healthy and might make it in the long run.  

The following are green flags to look out for in people around you  

1. Being around them keeps you at peace

One of the green flags to spot in people is when their presence in your life keeps you at peace. You know that feeling of calmness and peace that comes when you are with your loved ones? And you get to that point where you let your guard down because you know that there’s nothing to worry about. You can be free and not uptight around them. You are not on edge around them. And you don’t have to think excessively about things around them because they are your people.   

2. You are respected

Yes, if your friends respect and honour you, it is a big green flag. They respect your opinions and your persona. They honour your decisions and respect you even while you’re on your journey to being better. They don’t try to pitch their own thought patterns on you by force, they allow you and respect your projections even if they don’t completely understand.    

3. They listen

Never trade your person for anything ephemeral if they listen to you. These ones listen to you genuinely and would never rudely interrupt you by bringing in their judgement on that issue.   

4. They correct you in love

This is also another point that shows that they respect you. They correct you in love whenever you do wrong. They wouldn’t stab you in the back for any reason. They’d rather have you realise your mistakes by calling you out without taking out the love factor.   

It’s a big green flag you should look out for in your personality. Their corrections don’t leave you feeling worthless and shattered. Why? Because they help you correct your mistakes lovingly.   

5. They are supportive

Do you know those ones who claim to be your friend but run away at the slightest sign of trouble? Yes! Avoid them. If you have someone who supports you through thick and thin, even when they do not understand it or have no idea what the full picture is, that’s a green flag. Hold them tight, don’t let them go.  

6. They make you feel good about yourself

They never run you down with their words. They never try to demean you or make you feel less of yourself. They help you when you feel less confident and don’t hesitate to praise you and let you know if you feel confident, and above all, show it. They feel safe and secure and never try to push their insecurities on you.   

7. They respect your boundaries

They would never do anything to intentionally make you feel uncomfortable. They respect your boundaries, and will never intentionally do anything you do not agree with. For instance, if you don’t like to post pictures, they would never do it against your will.   

8. They introduce you to opportunities

A secure friend will introduce you to opportunities that would help you get better. This right here is another green flag to look out for in your personality. They let you in on offers, training, classes, meetings, events, and programmes alike that would help you get better.  

9. They buy you food

As insignificant as this seems, it is a green flag. They buy you food. They probably show up at your workplace at random with food when it’s really hectic for you and they know. Or you have been going through really hard times, they send you food and buy you gifts.   

10. They pay attention to details

This is another sign that they truly listen and are attentive to you. They buy you gifts centred around what you love, say things or affirmations that resonate with your dreams, and help you get more confident and motivated. It’s in the little things. It doesn’t have to be elaborate or too much. The little things with the purest intentions would go a long way.   

In conclusion, can your friends say all of these or the aforementioned about you? Aspire to be that person you’d like your friend to be. Are you supportive,? Do you listen to them without being judgmental? Are you disrespectful? Do you dishonour them? Do you make them feel safe and peaceful around you? Are you selfish?   

What will you do differently from today?  

Eunice Olaleye

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