Will you allow your spouse to be massaged by opposite sex?

MASSAGE is a way of manipulating the tissue or pressing someone’s body via rubbing, kneading, or tapping with hand or an instrument for therapeutic purpose.  It is a process many regard as sensitive and erotic. Although the process is therapeutic, many spouses reject the act for their partners due to the fear of the unknown, even when the process has a laid down rule and is done by professional male (Masseur) or female (Masseuse). Would you allow an opposite sex massage your spouse?

 

On WhatsApp Conversation, these are what those who joined the conversation and our experts said on the issue.

 

Emmanuel Adeboye.

No, I wouldn’t. It can be suggestive and start bringing in unnecessary erotic fantasies but If it’s so much needed, my wife and I  will go and learn how to massage ourselves.

 

Ola Ade

I would not allow such due to possibility of temptation and erection. It’s not a good idea.

 

Ben Idewor

At all times, we are left with at least two choices. To do it or not to do it. In my case, my girlfriend won’t allow it. Not because she does not trust me, but like most girls, she is very jealous. She expects me to be jealous too and not allow a guy massage her. We are born with jealousy. It’s in all of us.

 

Joseph Julius

Relationship is not slavery. It boils down to maturity and trust. As matured partners, trust plays in and that means you can vouch for spouse with an opposite sex. Why not?

 

Okunlola Oluwafemi

Accepting such depends on the kind of massage. It takes common sense in such situation. Massaging if the need be would be devoid of touching the sensitive part of my spouse. Because going as far as reaching out to those part is morally wrong. Rather, I would advise we get involved in exercises, stay in the comfort of our home and learn these massages and perform it for/on each other. This even strengthens the relationship and builds more psychological and emotional connection.

 

Sunday Adebayo

Yes, I will. To the extent that she’s my spouse does not mean she’s under a bondage not to have interaction with opposite sex. She has her private life and career to build.  All I need is to trust her to handle any complication that might arise from such incident and if she can’t be faithful to her marital vow, then she’s not good enough to be my spouse

 

Gloria Merimikwu

No, I won’t. I can’t afford to freely and consciously give out my spouse in the name of massage. Instead, I will learn how to do the massage the way he likes it. His satisfaction is my duty not for another

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Jaiyesimi Titilayo

Well, there is every tendency for men to respond to touches. Allowing my husband get a massage from another female is risky Although, it is weird for same sex (male) to massage one another yet I strongly believe in self-control.  Going to a spa to get a massage can send sexual arousal or stimulation to a man if there are mutual feelings from both ends.

 

Adekunle Isa K

I won’t since I know that a slip in the process can result to infidelity.

 

Isola Luke Adeyemi

The issue of massage is a very sensitive one. Our body is sensitive to touch. As much as massage is good for the body, I can’t allow opposite sex to journey on that route, not because of anything but to prevent any danger that might result to loss of trust.

 

Amana Solomon

Massaging my wife is my primary responsibility, I cannot and I will not allow another man to do it for me.  Especially when I know after massage what follows.

 

Beauty Ogidiolu

There should be no problem about opposite sex massaging my spouse. First, I might not be able to do it professionally when the need arises. All I will do is that during the process, I will be there.

 

Stephen Ajagbe

I don’t think It’s okay even when I am present there. Doing that in my presence may result to internal ‘war ‘ between us. I can’t stand seeing a man perusing my wife’s body all in the name of massage.

 

Olaitan Bolajoko

It all depends on the level of trust you have for your spouse. If he is someone you trust to the bone you won’t be disturbed by it, but if it is otherwise there is no need of him going anywhere. I will try my best him in massaging him myself.

 

 

Ibrahim Kazeem

Everything boils down to trust. If I trust my partner and I shouldn’t have any problem with my partner getting massaged by a man. After all, they have had encounters with male medical doctors.

 

Expert Speaks

Olubusoye Samuel is our expert on this issue. Dealing with cases like this takes cautious and level of sensitivity. The first thing you need to sort out with your spouse is: Does she really need someone else to help her with the massage even when you are around and available? Because it is one thing to be around and it’s another thing to be available. If as a matter or necessity and urgency and she really needs the help of a professional, of course you should allow her to be massaged by an opposite sex because it’s for her (your) benefit. But it is expedient you should have some terms and conditions which must be met before you allowed her. Such as:  If the massage is of a matter of necessity and urgency or it is something you can’t help her with as your spouse. Also, if you would have to be at the Spa with her or call for a home service. If all these conditions are met, then she is good to go. Understanding and Dialogue save us lot of stress.

Next week on WhatsApp Conversation, we would be treating: Would you marry a lady who earns more than you or is your boss?

Join our WhatsApp Conversation every Sunday by 8pm or send in your comments (50 words) to the phone number, email address above or Twitter handle: @WhatsAppConvs

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