Every relationship is first about values, this is even more vivid in a romantic relationship. When these values that are held dear by both parties suffer a breakdown, there is said to be a deal-breaker. For some others, the deal-breaker is the point of no return in the relationship where the action triggers unrepairable ill, leading to the collapse of the relationship.
On this week’s episode of WhatsApp Conversation, the question is ‘What is the deal-breaker for you? What value breakage do you consider unforgivable?’ Respondents weigh in:
If she does not trust me enough, always looking out for errors and if she doesn’t support me at all. If she is just there to collect and receive all the time without having any significant input, then, we will have to part ways.
The major deal-breaker is cheating, everyone would say.
If you cheat, doing it as a first-timer while in that relationship, if you show the proper reaction which includes remorse and regret, I could forgive. If it happens a second time, I will term it as unforgivable, unforgettable, and the relationship, non-renewable.
I cannot cope with catching my partner cheat on me. Although I will eventually forgive her and over the years forget but I cannot take her back. There is no going back and forth, once we get to that bridge, there is no going back.
Being unsupportive. If you cannot support the one you love when he or she is down or stressed because of some life event, you are communicating that it is not worth your time and energy. This makes your loved one feel invalid. If you cannot be there for your other half and do not care to change, it is time to leave. If you want to keep your relationship, learn to be supportive.
Oladepo Olakanmi Ephraim
To an extent, I believe the whole ‘trust’ of a thing is exaggerated. Responsibility comes first; trust is built afterwards. So, I’ll end any relationship if the other party is not taking responsibility when due, and actively working to improve the relationship. If I’ll renew, it’ll largely depend on the circumstances at hand. But it is a possibility to renew.
Olaoye Dorcas Blessing
For me, the biggest thing that can cause me to end a relationship with anyone is when my partner is unrepentantly lazy. I honestly cannot cope with an attitude like that. On renewing the relationship, there’s a chance it can happen, but it depends on the improvement I can see.
Cheating and abuse (either physical or verbal) will make me end a relationship. I can never forgive cheating and abuse- forgiving those will be like losing the respect I have got for myself. Seriously, I do not even want to know what pushed him to those, I will end the relationship no matter what.
Very funny but someone asked me this same question last week and my answer was, “betrayal”.
I will surely forgive because forgiveness releases me too, plus heaven is important to me but it will be very difficult to renew a relationship after betrayal, which some people say is being taken for a fool.
I know Jesus would have gladly renewed the relationship with Judas and with GOD’S help, I believe this is possible too but humanly speaking, it is difficult.
I cannot stand someone that smokes. Like I have seen how smoking can cause a lot of havoc so the moment I catch you or find out that you are smoking, it is the end for me. I would end the relationship, that does not mean I have not forgiven you though.
The deal-breaker for me will be that the other party is bent on doing the wrong things consistently. The problem is in the consistency, if a man cheats, he can be forgiven. I will forgive the man but the moment the process continues, it is a no! If you keep on lying or you go back on your words and the things we hold dear, it is time to move on.
One of two things: Disrespect and or not being loyal to him. Now those two things cover a lot of topics regarding relationships. Here some examples.
Showing someone else especially another man more loyalty, saying one thing, and doing another.
When you have shown him blatant disrespect and then start throwing petty accusations at him, like calling him immature, jealous, petty. Playing games with his emotions. Talking bad about him or making fun of him behind his back or to his face. When he’s quick to forgive you and move on, you are not so much. That is a big one.
Not trusting him after being with him for a while. If your months into a relationship and still choose not to trust him why are you still around?
Not listening to him when he is trying to look out for your safety.
Lying to him just to make a problem disappear.
Any of these can make me leave a relationship. But the unforgivable part, there is nothing, I mean no offense is worth it if Christ would forgive, forget my wrongs and renew my lost love to God the Father, then I say, nothing, no offense can make me unable to do that.
Next week, the topic of discussion will be: What was your experience with heartbreaks in relationships?
To be part of the next edition, send your response to 0813361345.
YOU SHOULD NOT MISS THESE HEADLINES FROM NIGERIAN TRIBUNE
Nigeria’s new COVID-19 infections increased again last week, Tribune Online analysis shows.
Last week, the 46th week of the pandemic in Nigeria, the country recorded 1,206 new infections (November 8 – 14), an increase when compared to the 923 cases recorded the previous week…
After two years of marriage and waiting on the Lord, the Ooni of Ife and his Queen, Naomi Silekunola, on Wednesday, announced the arrival of a baby boy into the royal house of Oduduwa.
Kamala Harris made history on Saturday with her election as Joe Biden’s vice president, becoming the first woman, first Black American and first Asian American to win the second-highest US office.