Understanding companionship in marriage

ONE major purpose of marriage, if not the main one, is companionship. Loneliness is hazardous to human life, and being without someone to love is killing. Despite this need for companionship that brings two people together as husband and wife, many couples hardly maintain that status. No wonder a lot of marriages are hitting the rock like thunderbolt.

Without companionship, marriage is a mirage. Companionship is the key determinant factor of any lasting marriage. Simply stated, companionship is having someone to keep you company. And the company is basically about two persons. That is why a popular saying makes is clear that ‘2 is a company, 3 is a crowd’.

Marital companionship means that no person, that I often called ‘an intruder’, however important to the husband and wife, is allowed a foot in the marriage. Parents, siblings, friends, bosses, even pastors/imams will make marital companionship a crowd.

Not even the children are allowed to interfere in this companionship of husband and wife. Your spouse is supposed to be your best friend if you are              in true companionship in the marriage. Some couples are not friends at all, but strange bed fellows using themselves for sexual gratification. They are merely tolerating themselves: they argue, quarrel and fight over and about almost everything, all of the time.

Being each other’s friends or companion requires the following among others:

• Talking together
• Spending quality time together
• Visiting together
• Eating together
• Planning together
• Living together
• Sexing together

Marriages are fast crumbling these days like a pack of cards because the above listed issues have become trivialized for whatever reasons. May be, we may fully consider these issues in subsequent write up in this column.

My book, ENJOYING GREAT SEXLIFE, is a good manual to help preserve the marriage institution. You can call me on 08112658560 for copies.