O NE of the reasons often alluded to during marriage ceremonies, whether traditional, church, or registry, is that it makes sexual fulfilment a reality. That is, in marriage, you receive the’licence’ to have sex, as often as possible.
However, it is interesting to note that marriage, in most cases, does not make sex available as it’s often potrayed during wedding ceremony. This is because sex is usually being endured, rather than enjoyed by many married couples. That is why the most commonly discussed marital issue among couples is sex. For many married couples, sex has become an obligation instead of an adventure. When this is so, sex has become an activity that is done for a spouse, rather than something that is done with the spouse. When this is the case, the beauty of marital sex is lost. For sex to be beautiful in the marriage, it must be mutually beneficial to the two partners. But, in reality, many couples cannot boast of the beauty of sex in their marriage.
How do we achieve the beauty of marital sex?
Like earlier stated here, sex becomes beautiful in marriage when it becomes an adventure. That is, it catches the attention of the spouses, and gives them deep satisfaction.
To achieve this beauty of sex status in marriage, the following issues must be well taken care of.
- Varieties of ways to engage in it must be explored by a couple.
These varieties have to do with the styles. That is, the position a couple takes when having sex. A couple that wants adventure in sex must go beyond the traditional position of husband on top of the wife, which is often referred to these days as the missionary style. A couple must try other positions such as, doggie, spoon, reverse cowgirl, etc. You can get more from my book, Enjoying Great Sex Life. All these varieties produce adventurous pleasure, that makes sex something to be looked forward to, and excitedly too, by couples.
Locations also give room for adventure. Traditionally, sex should take place in the room, and on the bed. However, today’s exposure has led to sex being explored out of the room and bed setting, making places like sitting room and chairs, kitchen area, bathroom tub, staircase and car garage as perfect places for marital sex. The only condition that must be met is absolute privacy of the couple.
- Sexy attires.
Unlike in the traditional manner, married couples should wear sexually provocating dresses within the confine of their private space, to add fun to the act of sex. Skimpy shots, braless tops, slim fit short, and revealing, i.e. see through, dresses are perfect sex turn on for married couples. These can be done intentionally to up the adventure in the act of sex.
- Sex talks and chats
These prepare the mood for an adventurous evening or night for a married couple. We have shared some of these sex talks and chats on this platform in the past. So, you can avail yourself of such, if you need tutorial or refresher’s course.
- Romantic acts
Building romance into marriage is a good appetizer for adventurous sex. When you sing love tunes for each other, hold hands, nudge closely together on the couch, and having pillow fight, around the house, make a perfect set up for sex in the marriage. A fun filled marriage cannot be lacking in sexual adventure.
- Get away evening or weekend, add spices to the beauty of sex.
You just escape to a resort, parks and garden, or hotel premises, for a moment of your life, will see a couple enjoying great sex in their marriage. It affords you the time of your life, like the days of your honeymoon. In fact, doing so makes your marriage to enjoy the status of honeymoon forever. It’s a good therapy against side chicks and side cocks, palava, confronting marriage these days. Let your love nest be for you and your spouse. It costs less at the end of the day, when compared to that of side chicks and side cocks.
All the above must be engaged intentionally, rather than being a fence mending therapy. That’s what brings out the beauty of sex in marriage, thus making it something you do with your spouse, rather than doing it for him or her. Doing it for him or her is what Tony and Aliza Dilorenzo called obligation sex, in one of their write ups. According to them, “obligation sex is hard on both spouses”. The spouse “receiving it knows that the other is doing it out of obligation. The spouse giving it doesn’t necessarily want to be there. And that is no fun for anyone”. That means sex is a duty bound affair with such couples.
Life expectancy is reducing drastically, at least, on this side of the world, so give yourself as much fun as you can get while it lasts. You don’t have two lives to live, neither do you have all of the time to live on Earth. Why not make hay while the sun shines? It’s the least favour you can do for yourself. So, take full advantage of this one life.
My book, Enjoying Great Sex Life, is still available for sale. For details, 08112658560, is the contact number.
YOU SHOULD NOT MISS THESE HEADLINES FROM NIGERIAN TRIBUNE
In spite of the huge investment in the water sector by the government and international organisations, water scarcity has grown to become a perennial nightmare for residents of Abeokuta, the Ogun State capital. This report x-rays the lives and experiences of residents in getting clean, potable and affordable water amidst the surge of COVID-19 cases in the state…
The Lagos-Ibadan railway was inaugurated recently for a full paid operation by the Nigerian Railway Corporation after about a year of free test-run. Our reporter joined the train to and fro Lagos from Ibadan and tells his experience in this report…