Stay-at-home moms used to be quite popular in the past and there are still women who want to be housewives. Flip the switch to the other gender and we will have some will be discussing problems. This week on WhatsApp Conversation, we stay-at-home dad. Is it a smash or a pass? Here are participants opinions:
I honestly do not see anything wrong in a stay at home dad. The only thing that will be wrong here will be society. Society is always telling us – o yeah, you must live this way, and that way, no this is unacceptable but everything is acceptable in the world we live in, just give it time and society will unconsciously agree with you. It is like my philosophy is getting out of hand
But the point is, this is life, and there are no rules except those laid out by the creator. Consider all other human rules as crap, only using them to your advantage when needed, and you’ll be fine.
Oladepo Olakanmi Ephraim
I remember asking similar questions from a friend; his response was much fiercer than I had anticipated. The idea of being a stay-at-home dad has everything in contradiction with the social definition of a ‘Man’. Besides, the psychological damage that could arise from being labeled a ‘man running from responsibilities’ is much weightier than the potential pros. For me, it is a straight yes- barring a social revolution. There is nothing wrong with being a stay-at-home dad, as long as you do your duties.
A stay-at-home dad is a dad. He exists because the family is more important than preserving traditions. I will not say he reduces himself being the way because our world has made us look at gender a certain way. If he does this by choice, he is still a man. If he does not do this by choice, by the harsh reality that the labour market no longer favours him, he is still a man. And as a dad, if the child benefits from his new role, then all the better.
Well, this depends. Is the stay-at-home dad working from home or just the gender equivalent of a housewife? Either way, I am not against it, as far as he can man up and handle the traditional role switching and do a damn good job while at it.
It’s not it for me. If you can’t be creative enough to find something doing, then I am making a mistake being with you. It is a no-brainer for me, in a changing world, the idea of a stay-at-home mom is being frowned at. We cannot just up the ante like that.
I am totally in support of the stay-at-home dad idea. It will be surprising to a lot of people that there are jobs you can do from home that will pay much more than the jobs you are out there doing. The world of work has changed and as long as you can get something done while you are home, it’s cool. I work from home and I know how these things work. Staying at home will make the bond with the family stronger, everyone will be happy.
Culturally and religiously, the father is supposed to be fending for the family. Why then would a father become a stay at home dad? Well, except he runs a business from the home but if he is not then I do not support the stay-at-home dad idea.
As a man, staying at home has a strange taste to it. Yes, the world is rapidly changing and we are fast catching up. However, you cannot take away the place of culture from what occurs with us as people. In this country, a stay at home dad will be viewed as lazy. This might not be necessarily true but people will pass judgment before they even examine the facts. Afterall, this is Nigeria!
There is nothing fundamentally wrong with being a stay-at home dad. The reason a lot of men will disagree is because they want to bow to the cultural pressures and the societal norm. That in itself is not a bad thing, however, we must not be so quick to pass judgment. What if you get a remote job where you only go out when you feel like it?
If there is nothing wrong with being a stay-at-home mom, why should there be a thing that is wrong with being a stay-at home dad? As long as the dad provides as necessary within the house. Of course, he is not going to be idle but if he can work from home, why would anybody say no to that?
Next week, the topic of discussion will be: What would cause you to end a relationship? Would you be able to forgive and forget and renew the relationship?
To be part of the next edition, send your response to 0813361345.
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