Skills for mutual sexual satisfaction in marriage

Mutual sexual satisfaction in marriage must be given priority by couples. It is the heartbeat of sex in marriage. Without it, the marriage is bound to suffer because the dissatisfied spouse may suffer in silence or seek for satisfaction outside the marriage.  To avoid such unpleasant experiences in marriage, it becomes necessary for couples to work on themselves so as to fulfill one of the reasons for marriage, which is sexual fulfilment.

Below are some of the things that make for mutual sexual satisfaction. However, let me state here that the issue of mutual sexual satisfaction involves a lot of things that can not be captured in one write-up like this. What I am doing is just like tips for couples to work with.

  • Understanding that act of sex is simply more than rising and sinking

Both partners must understand this fact that sex is beyond in and out of the two main sex organs. Many couples don’t know beyond that simple approach to sex. Thus, they only derive pleasure of procreation from sex.  Mutual sexual satisfaction demands this knowledge from the partners.

  • Recognition of the difference in the body make up man and woman.

This difference is what makes for the sexual responses of a man and a woman. A healthy man responds instantly to sexual prompting with erection. A woman on the other hand takes time to respond to sexual prompting. That’s why a man is likened to an helicopter which doesn’t need to taxi before taking off, while a woman is likened to an aeroplane, needing time to taxi before taking off for its flight. Thus, for a man, sex is an “any day, and any time” thing. No special preparation to have sexual intercourse, merely seeing the naked parts of a female is enough for him to get aroused. A woman, however, needs time to prepare for a good sexual intercourse. She needs time to be sexually aroused.

Someone once said that sex and food are the only two things on the mind of a man when coming back home after work. But for a woman, sex is the last thing on her mind.  That’s why King Solomon describes a  woman as a well. To get water from a well, you must be ready to reach deep down into it. Likewise, it is with a woman. Her man must be patient enough to reach deep down into her, with affectionate acts to bring her to a point of sexual excitement. Knowing all of these differences make for mutual sexual satisfaction. The beauty of sex is lost when the fulfilment is not mutual.

The goal of each couple must be to make sex something each of them is looking forward to, and this is only realisable when the enjoyment derived is mutual.

  • Participation in the act of sex must be mutual.

You cannot make your sexual satisfaction mutual if you are passive in bed. As he is touching you in the inners, you are also pulling his beard and mustache, or doing something with any part of his body. You cannot be lying down like a log of wood, and expect mutual sexual satisfaction to play out. Be an active participant in the act of sex, and not a passive one. It’s only then that you can have mutual satisfaction in the very act.

  • Knowledge of the sex channels of each other.

These are multiple pleasure points on the body of each other. It is where you can fan the flame of fire in the act of sex. It determines the kind of responses and how quickly each response will come. Whether moanings, or body tremors or verbal expressions, the channels are the turning points to search out. When each of you know these points, your mutual sexual satisfaction is guaranteed.

  • Knowledge of sexual positions or styles.

Couples who want to mutually enjoy sex must do more than just the traditional missionary style of man on top, woman under. Knowledge of different styles in bed enhances mutual satisfaction. I have written much on this in this column. You can get it from previous articles.

These are some of the tips for mutual sexual satisfaction.

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