Most actresses don’t know what marriage is all about —Actress Nazareth Jesse
Nazareth Jesse Bako is one of the budding actresses whose rise in the film industry has been steady and impressive. Born in Kuje Area Council of the Federal Capital Territory (FCT), Abuja, but raised in Bida, Niger State, Jesse began her acting career as a student and has since risen to a script writer and filmmaker within four years of professional engagement. The graduate of Economics, who said she has a stint with relationship mentorship, shared among other things her thoughts on marriage in this interview with Newton-Ray Ukwuoma. Excerpts:
How did your journey to the movie industry commence?
I embraced the opportunity while I was in school. A senior colleague approached me with the offer to work in the industry. I obliged. After a few projects, I found that I belonged in Nollywood. That was when my passion for acting and making movies began.
What have you achieved personally since you started?
I have not attained the height I am aiming for and I may not say I am fulfilled, but it is a thing of passion for me and I love it here. The movie business has not yielded as much income as we deserve in Nigeria but we can’t give up yet.
Have you done any movie recently?
Yes, I have been featured in three movies. I’m currently working on another one.
Aside acting, what else do you do?
Aside acting, I am into event planning, facial modeling and mentorship in terms of relationships. I was also into buying and selling of wears but it has been suspended for now. I write scripts and I am also working to get to the highest echelon of movie production, which is being a full-fledged producer.
In one of your posts on social media, you hinted that you were facing some pressure to get married. As a relationship mentor, would you like to share with us how you handled it?
Yes, sure. It was from one of my parents. I had to make them understand I can›t force myself on a man or settle with just anyone that comes asking for my hand in marriage. We have seen how so many people rush in and out of marriages. Now, my parents are praying for me to settle with a better person who will be compatible with me.
Are you saying you’re not in any serious relationship right now?
No. The one I had was not serious. So, I’m very single and ready to mingle. I can’t keep fooling myself over a distant relationship that does not favour me.
What have you found is the one reason marriages crash these days?
The main reason marriage crash is adultery. Both the rich and the poor experience same thing. Lots of women are dying in silence. They won’t talk or go for orientation rather they go into adultery to keep their minds busy.
Does this apply to Nollywood actors too?
I can’t speak for our actresses though, but from what I see and hear I think most of them don’t know what marriage is all about. Marriage is a different field on its own. Marriage needs attention and commitment. You can’t be married to a man who is not in your field and who does not like your career. Even if you had an agreement with a partner who is not in the industry; you as the woman should know you are starting a different life entirely that you have to be committed and submissive to your man to make the marriage work. But most women raise shoulders with their husbands or go against him because of the supposed passion for being on the screen. It is not that it is a licence for men to cheat, but some men cheat because of that. Also, I advise women not to marry lazy men who are cute or good in bed. This kind of men will end up pushing you into prostitution or adultery.
Would you like to shed more light on why women cheat?
When you marry a lazy man, a gold digger, a prayer less man, a man without vision or a man that can’t perform his marital duties, a man that beats his wife, all these are enough to push a woman into adultery. However, some women on their parts are possessed of demons — they can’t stay without a man – some just have long throats and want to have everything the other woman has without knowing how she got it. All these factors push a woman into adultery. But when a man is lazy and cannot meet up with her needs, this is the number one cause of cheating in women, beside infidelity on the part of the men and poor sexual satisfaction.
What is your advice for the best kind of man to marry, even for you?
There is nothing like having a man that gives you peace, love and support. It takes the fear of God in a man to have these qualities and to express it towards a woman. I like my man to have vision, be kind-hearted, literate with prospects, a God-fearing man that is ready to have me as his life partner and not just a baby factory.
Do looks and pocket size matter to you?
Those ones are very important. He must be well to do financially and handsome too. A man that wants to marry me should be ready to take up all my responsibilities when I become his wife. Then for his looks, it all depends on me because they say beauty is in the eyes of the beholder. I don’t like handsome men. I like my man to have that ‘manly’ look if there is a word like that. I’m not saying my man must be a billionaire, but if a billionaire comes my way, to God be the glory. That’s also an answered prayer. Lest I forget, my man must be romantic and sexy. Because I have seen and heard so many Nigerian women complain about their husbands not being romantic. Mine must be romantic please because I don’t want to cheat on my man. I hate adultery.
During your early days in the industry, did you encounter sexual harassment?
That one is normal and it happens in every sector too. But as long as you know what you want, all you need to do is focus on the reason why you are in the industry which I did. These days, the girls sexually harass the producers instead. They want to be known and seen on TV by all means. We also have street hustlers coming into industry to boost their business too.
You recently co-produced a movie, how was the experience?
It wasn’t easy dealing with people who don’t know the pain of expending huge sums of money daily. It was just patience and humility that helped me. I was doing it secretly because I don’t want to be seen like a competitor with my bosses. So, I didn’t announce it as I should have. However, I wanted to test that aspect of the industry.
If you have a chance what would you change about Nigerian movie industry?
I will change the rate at which our movies are being produced because when you spend more time in crafting, you achieve a better result and better result equals to good money. Sadly, we see lots of avoidable errors in our movies and people just ignore.
When you ventured into Nollywood, how did your parents react?
They had different plan and visions for me, so they kicked against it. So, I had to go to locations secretly but after a while, they stopped complaining and said ‘You are an adult you have the right to choose your career’.
Do you have any embarrassing encounter with a male fan that has remained with you?
No. I just learn to be straight forward with them. There have been some very embarrassing moments, but none that I couldn’t handle. I have learnt to be calm even with some of them who do not have manners. Two wrongs can’t make a right.
What are your plans for the rest part of 2019?
So many good things to come this year by the grace of God, I just wait as they unfold one after the other.