How do I break the Ice?

Dear Yemisi,

I just rounded off the compulsory national service, my problem is this, I have been lonely ,not because I chose to, but because I felt I am a bit bashful and unable to make overture to girls.

My question is this, for how long will a man be trepid and have the courage to talk to a girl of his choice? At 28, a graduate who just finished his service is still faced with such challenge. I want to believe my situation calls for serious concern, my days in the university was also greeted with such challenge.

Please, I entreat you to advise me on what to do. How do I break the ice? I seriously need a companion right away.

Thanks

Kingsley, 08*****8**1.

Dear Kingsley,

At 28, you should have overcome shocks that might be associated with the thought of being refused attention or affection by a lady.

Kingsley, the time to come out of your shell is now. In the first instance, for how long will you continue to keep to yourself? It is either you open up and learn from your mistakes or you remain incommunicado and suffer in silence.

Please, in 2017, come out of your shell and be counted. You need to strategise better in terms of networking. You have to increase the tempo of your interaction preferably with the opposite sex whom you are not familiar with not necessarily by showing too much of desperation.

There is no harm in having some standards in place, but you need to relax some as it is not possible to see all the qualities in a lady of your choice. Once you learn how to interact more with ladies will to a certain extent increase your public confidence and drive out fear and shyness that you are experiencing now.

You have to have it at the back of your mind that it is either you are welcomed or rebuffed at the first trial. You don’t give up at the first shot at talking to a lady. If A says no, your next attempt might be the one you have been longing to have.

Honestly speaking, strategic alliance with decent ladies out there would help you as they in return would like to see or visit you which will naturally open the door.

In case you have sisters and female cousins, please, don’t shut up. Let them know your predicament, they can do the networking on your behalf once they know your weakness. But wanting to pretend will not get you out of the problem.

In addition, tell God your problem and I know that He will surely guide you.