I T is no longer news that sex in marriage is a thing of great importance. Every one agrees that sex is the neck on which marriage rotates, or is controlled. Sex is one of the reasons for which the marriage institution is in place.So, sex is expected to be a thing of great prominence in marriage.
However, issues of infidelity and rape involving married people have cast a shadow on the effectiveness of marriage in providing sexual satisfaction for the married. This becomes more critical when men in positions of power, now use same to secure sex gratification, from willing and unwilling victims. No thanks to the recent scandalous sex for marks, involving lectures in our universities. One can only imagine why these married men, throwhonour and caution to the wind, by stooping so low to bring shame to their highly exalted offices, ridiculing their profession, and religious calling, when such men turn out to be ofclergy personality, for what they sleep and wake up with in their marriage.
To my curious mind, I feel that these incidents are deeply rooted in the marriage setting, and the solution lies primarily there, as well. Couples should take the sex act in the marriage to the next level, where satisfaction is given adequate attention, as a matter of urgency and priority. While sex may not be completely absent, it may not be easily accessible, or inadequate, or unpleasurable. These issues are undeniable due to what we have been witnessing as marriage counselors. By experience, therefore, sexual satisfaction in many marriages, falls short of what can be termed, the next level sex.
Next level sex, which is targeted at maximum sexual satisfaction, involves the following, among others things:
- Next level sex must be available just for the asking. No coming up with wierd sexual behaviour of headache, backache,or non existing mensuration. Let sex in your marriage be if my spouse want it now, it must be available
- Next level sex must be for the mutual satisfaction of the couple. There is no using your spouse for your own selfish enjoyment. You don’t have sex only on your own terms: when you want it, where and how you want it, without consideration for your spouse’s desire.
- Next level sex just must be skillful. A lot of Couples don’t pay attention to the skills involved in sex. All they know is just to rise and sink, using the missionary sex style. Next level sex is way beyond that. Couples must step up their sex game to satisfy themselves, and save their families from the embarrassing scenario of being caught in sex scandal.
I strongly believe that if couples do all to satisfy themselves in the marriage, even the randy rambo ones could also be tamed. After all, Lions and other wild animals are being tamed, with what they enjoy feeding on. Sex styles, information, and free expression of sexual needs and preference at home are necessary for a great marriage. So, let the married do the needful.
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